But now that he was no longer in the dungeon of the prison, where
despair might breed bravery in a timid soul, but under the open sky,
where hope and memory grow strong together, he knew, though he tried to
shut his heart to it, that his courage was oozing away. He recognized
this house and that gate, he knew every turn of the river--where the
trout lurked and where the eels sported--and when he looked up at the
dun sky he knew how long it might take for the lightning to break
through the luminous dulness of the thunder-cloud that hung over the
head of Slieu Whallin. Do what he would to keep his mind a blank, or to
busy it with trifles of the way, he could not help reflecting that he
was seeing these things for the last time.
Then there came a long interval in which the cart wherein he sat seemed
to go wearily on, on, on, and nothing awakened his slumbering senses.
When he recovered consciousness with a start he knew that his mind had
been busy with many thoughts such as sap a man's resolution and bring
his brave schemes to foolishness. He had been asking himself where his
father was that day, where Mona would be then, and how deep their shame
must be at the thought of the death he was to die. To him his death was
his expiation, and little had he thought of the manner of it; but to
them it was disgrace and horror. And so he shrunk within himself. He
knew now that his great purpose was drifting away like a foolish voice
that is emptied in the air. Groaning audibly, praying in broken snatches
for strength of spirit, looking up and around with fearful eyes, he rode
on and on, until at length, before he was yet near the end of his awful
ride, the deep sound came floating to him through the air of the voices
of the people gathered at the foot of Tynwald. It was like the sound the
sea makes as its white breakers fall on some sharp reef a mile away: a
deep, multitudinous hum of many tongues. When he lifted his head and
heard it, his pallid face became ashy, his whitening lips trembled, his
head dropped back to his breast, his fettered arms fell between his
fettered legs, river and sky were blotted out of his eyes, and he knew
that before the face of his death he was no better than a poor broken
coward.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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