Love stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Speculation -- Fiction; Wall Street (New York, N.Y.) -- Fiction
A pause, then: “It _has_ been settled,” she said, like a child that
feels, yet denies, its impotence as it struggles in the compelling arms of
its father. “I thought until a few minutes ago that I really intended to
marry you. Now I see that I didn't.”
“Another reason why we're not going to your uncle's,” said I.
She leaned forward so that I could see her face. “I can not marry you,” she
said. “I feel humble toward you, for having misled you. But it is better
that you--and I--should have found out now than too late.”
“It is too late--too late to go back.”
“Would you wish to marry a woman who does not love you, who loves some one
else, and who tells you so and refuses to marry you?” She had tried to
concentrate enough scorn into her voice to hide her fear.
“I would,” said I. “And I shall. I'll not desert you, Anita, when your
courage and strength shall fail. I will carry you on to safety.”
“I tell you I can not marry you,” she cried, between appeal and command.
“There are reasons--I may not tell you. But if I might, you would--would
take me to my uncle's. I can not marry you!”
“That is what conventionality bids you say now,” I replied. And then I
gathered myself together and in a tone that made me hate myself as I
heard it, I added slowly, each word sharp and distinct: “But what will
conventionality bid you say to-morrow morning, as we drive down crowded
Fifth Avenue, after a night in this brougham?”
I could not see her, for she fell back into the darkness as sharply as if
I had struck her with all my force full in the face. But I could feel the
effect of my words upon her. I paused, not because I expected or wished
an answer, but because I had to steady myself--myself, not my purpose; my
purpose was inflexible. I would put through what we had begun, just as I
would have held her and cut off her arm with my pocket-knife if we had
been cast away alone, and I had had to do it to save her life. She was
not competent to decide for herself. Every problem that had ever faced
her had been decided by others for her. Who but me could decide for her
now? I longed to plead with her, longed to let her see that I was not
hard-hearted, was thinking of her, was acting for her sake as much as for
my own. But I dared not. “She would misunderstand,” said I to myself. “She
would think you were weakening.”
Full fifteen minutes of that frightful silence before she said: “I will go
where you wish.” And she said it in a tone that makes me wince as I recall
it.
I called my partner's address up through the tube. Again that frightful
silence, then she was trying to choke back the sobs. A few words I caught:
“They have broken my will--they have broken my will.”
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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