Then gradually the sun left his home in the eastern mountain, and
ascended the sky. And warmed by his beams, a little of her strength
returned: and after a while, she rose to her feet, which wandered
away, and carried her where they would, until they brought her to
another forest pool. And there she lay down, and leaned and drank of
its water. And she looked into its mirror, and saw herself, slender
and emaciated as the old moon, but pale and colourless as that moon
at mid-day[1]. And her long hair fell down over her shoulder into
the water. Then she bound up that wet hair into a knot, and remained
all day by the pool, not endeavouring to go further: for she said to
herself: Rather let me stay here to perish of hunger, or furnish
myself food to some wild beast, than continue my journey through a
wood filled with illusions worse than a hundred deaths. For they
wear the guise of a friend, and so finding entrance into my heart
sting it like serpents, turning into poison the nectar of him whom
most of all I long to see. Surely my sins in a former birth were
terrible in their enormity: for I have suffered in this existence
pain sufficient for many lives. And now I feel that I cannot long
endure, for my strength is becoming exhausted. O that I could indeed
find my husband, were it only to die in his arms!
So she sat by the pool, grieving like a female _chakrawáka_ for her
mate, while the sun made, like the enemy of Bali, but three steps
over the sky. And when at last he sank, she also grew weary, and
fell asleep on the edge of the pool. And in her dreams she saw her
husband, and drank her fill of the nectar of his embraces. And then,
in the dead of night, she awoke, and sat up, and looked, and lo!
there in the moonlight she saw him again, silently sitting beside
her. And she leaped to her feet in agony, and turned to fly, and
screamed aloud. For there stood before her another husband on the
other side. Then suddenly the whole wood was full of laughter. And
her reason fled, and she became mad. And she exclaimed: Out on this
wood, for it is full of husbands! And she began to run through the
wood, shutting her eyes, and stopping her ears.
[1] The same idea is beautifully put by Butler in Hudibras, where he
calls the sun's light on the moon a
Mysterious veil, of brightness made,
That's both her lustre and her shade.
XVI.
Before Dawn
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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