Round the camp-fires the Blue Devils stood or lay, trying to rest. But
the habit of the trenches was upon them. Dorn gazed at each and every
soldier, so like in strange resemblance, so different in physical
characteristics; and the sad, profound, and terrifying knowledge came to
him of what they must have in their minds. He realized that all he
needed was to suffer and fight and live through some little part of the
war they had endured and then some truth would burst upon him. It was
there in the restless steps, in the prone forms, in the sunken, glaring
eyes. What soldiers, what men, what giants! Three and a half years of
unnamable and indescribable fury of action and strife of thought! Not
dead, nor stolid like oxen, were these soldiers of France. They had a
simplicity that seemed appalling. We have given all; we have stood in
the way, borne the brunt, saved you--this was flung at Dorn, not out of
their thought, but from their presence. The fact that they were there
was enough. He needed only to find these bravest of brave warriors real,
alive, throbbing men.
Dorn lingered there, loath to leave. The great lesson of his life held
vague connection in some way with this squad of French privates. But he
could not pierce the veil. This meeting came as a climax to four months
of momentous meetings with the best and the riffraff of many nations.
Dorn had studied, talked, listened, and learned. He who had as yet given
nothing, fought no enemy, saved no comrade or refugee or child in all
this whirlpool of battling millions, felt a profound sense of his
littleness, his ignorance. He who had imagined himself unfortunate had
been blind, sick, self-centered. Here were soldiers to whom comfort and
rest were the sweetest blessings upon the earth, and they could not
grasp them. No more could they grasp them than could the gaping
civilians and the distinguished travelers grasp what these grand hulks
of veteran soldiers had done. Once a group of civilians halted near the
soldiers. An officer was their escort. He tried to hurry them on, but
failed. Delorme edged away into the gloomy, damp barn rather than meet
such visitors. Some of his comrades followed suit. Ferier, the
incomparable of the Blue Devils, the wearer of all the French medals and
the bearer of twenty-five wounds received in battle--he sneaked away,
afraid and humble and sullen, to hide himself from the curious. That
action of Ferier's was a revelation to Dorn. He felt a sting of shame.
There were two classes of people in relation to this war--those who went
to fight and those who stayed behind. What had Delorme or Mathie or
Ferier to do with the world of selfish, comfortable, well-fed men? Dorn
heard a million voices of France crying out the bitter truth--that if
these war-bowed veterans ever returned alive to their homes it would be
with hopes and hearts and faiths burned out, with hands forever lost to
their old use, with bodies that the war had robbed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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