"Oh, I see, _they've_ asked you!" Saunders broke in. "Well, I'll have
to let you off. You may be sure you'll get something nice. They can
beat my cook getting up a spread. Well, I'll meet you later. I see
Leach over there by himself. I'll run over and get him on my list."
Saunders tried to jest. "They say he lives on wild berries, and nuts,
and anything else he can pick up. I guess he won't find fault with my
lunch."
Saunders was the host of fifty or more men, women, and children. He was
doing his best to see that all were provided for, and yet he had an eye
for a certain group under a beech on a near-by hillside. His heart
sank, for he saw Mostyn seated on the ground at Dolly's side. He saw
something later that sent a cold shock hurtling through him. He saw the
group after lunch rise from the cloth and gradually scatter, leaving
Dolly and Mostyn standing at the foot of the hill. A moment later they
were walking off, side by side, toward a spring in a shaded dell not
far away. The drooping boughs of the willow trees shut them out of
sight. Saunders, with a hopeless griping of the heart, went about
directing his servants and helping some belated guests to get what they
wished to eat. He heard himself joking, replying to jokes, and smiling
with lips which felt stiff.
The remains of the food had been taken up and replaced in the big
baskets when he saw Dolly and Mostyn strolling back from the spring.
Mostyn held her sunshade over her, his arm touching hers. The distance
was too great for Saunders to see their faces distinctly, but he would
have sworn that both reflected joy and peace.
"Oh, God, is it actually to be?" he groaned, inwardly. "_Ought_ it to
be? Here am I, eager to gratify her every wish, while he can give her
only the dry, crushed remains of his manhood, a bare scrap of his past
affluence. He scorned the sweetest flower of womanhood that ever
bloomed, and now crawls through his own mire to pluck it. It isn't
right--it isn't right! God knows it isn't right to her; leaving me and
my hopes out altogether--it isn't right to _her!_"
Cold from head to foot, Saunders retreated out of sight behind a clump
of bushes. Figuratively, he raised his hands to the impotent sky and
dumbly cried within himself:
"Oh, God, give me strength to bear it like a man! I was wrong in
hoping. She is his; she loves him. She loves him. I am an outsider. I
now know why I never dared tell her of my love--my adoration! It was
the still, inner voice of warning telling me to keep in my proper
place."
Presently he saw Dolly alone near the arbor, and, remembering his
engagement with her, he went to her.
"I have come to see if you would care to go now," he began. "I believe
there is only some irregular singing and speech-making to follow."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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