RIGHT, n. Legitimate authority to be, to do or to have; as the right to be a king, the right to do one's neighbor, the right to have measles, and the like. The first of these rights was once universally believed to be derived directly from the will of God; and this is still sometimes affirmed _in partibus infidelium_ outside the enlightened realms of Democracy; as the well known lines of Sir Abednego Bink, following: By what right, then, do royal rulers rule? Whose is the sanction of their state and pow'r? He surely were as stubborn as a mule Who, God unwilling, could maintain an hour His uninvited session on the throne, or air His pride securely in the Presidential chair. Whatever is is so by Right Divine; Whate'er occurs, God wills it so. Good land! It were a wondrous thing if His design A fool could baffle or a rogue withstand! If so, then God, I say (intending no offence) Is guilty of contributory negligence. RIGHTEOUSNESS, n. A sturdy virtue that was once found among the Pantidoodles inhabiting the lower part of the peninsula of Oque. Some feeble attempts were made by returned missionaries to introduce it into several European countries, but it appears to have been imperfectly expounded. An example of this faulty exposition is found in the only extant sermon of the pious Bishop Rowley, a characteristic passage from which is here given: "Now righteousness consisteth not merely in a holy state of mind, nor yet in performance of religious rites and obedience to the letter of the law. It is not enough that one be pious and just: one must see to it that others also are in the same state; and to this end compulsion is a proper means. Forasmuch as my injustice may work ill to another, so by his injustice may evil be wrought upon still another, the which it is as manifestly my duty to estop as to forestall mine own tort. Wherefore if I would be righteous I am bound to restrain my neighbor, by force if needful, in all those injurious enterprises from which, through a better disposition and by the help of Heaven, I do myself refrain." RIME, n. Agreeing sounds in the terminals of verse, mostly bad. The verses themselves, as distinguished from prose, mostly dull. Usually (and wickedly) spelled "rhyme." RIMER, n. A poet regarded with indifference or disesteem. The rimer quenches his unheeded fires, The sound surceases and the sense expires. Then the domestic dog, to east and west, Expounds the passions burning in his breast. The rising moon o'er that enchanted land Pauses to hear and yearns to understand. Mowbray Myles RIOT, n. A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders. R.I.P. A careless abbreviation of _requiescat in pace_, attesting an indolent goodwill to the dead. According to the learned Dr. Drigge, however, the letters originally meant nothing more than _reductus in pulvis_.