"Martin," she said, in her failing, plaintive voice, one evening when
Julia and I were both sitting with her, for we met now without any
regard to etiquette--"Martin, Julia and I have been talking about your
future life while you were away."
Julia's face flushed a little. She was seated on a footstool by my
mother's sofa, and looked softer and gentler than I had ever seen her
look. She had been nursing my mother with a single-hearted,
self-forgetful devotion that had often touched me, and had knit us to
one another by the common bond of an absorbing interest. Certainly I had
never leaned upon or loved Julia as I was doing now.
"There is no chance of your ever marrying Olivia now," continued my
mother, faintly, "and it is a sin for you to cherish your love for her.
That is a very plain duty, Martin."
"Such love as I cherish for Olivia will hurt neither her nor myself," I
answered. "I would not wrong her by a thought."
"But she can never be your wife," she said.
"I never think of her as my wife," I replied; "but I can no more cease
to love her than I can cease to breathe. She has become part of my life,
mother."
"Still, time and change must make a difference," she said. "You will
realize your loneliness when I am gone, though you cannot before. I want
to have some idea of what you will be doing in the years to come, before
we meet again. If I think at all, I shall be thinking of you, and I do
long to have some little notion. You will not mind me forming one poor
little plan for you once more, my boy?"
"No," I answered, smiling to keep back the tears that were ready to
start to my eyes.
"I scarcely know how to tell you," she said. "You must not be angry or
offended with us. But my dear Julia has promised me, out of pure love
and pity for me, you know, that if ever--how can I express it?--if you
ever wish you could return to the old plans--it may be a long time
first, but if you conquered your love for Olivia, and could go back, and
wished to go back to the time before you knew her--Julia will forget all
that has come between. Julia would consent to marry you if you asked her
to be your wife. O Martin, I should die so much happier if I thought you
would ever marry Julia, and go to live in the house I helped to get
ready for you!"
Julia's head had dropped upon my mother's shoulder, and her face was
hidden, while my mother's eyes sought mine beseechingly. I was
irresistibly overcome by this new proof of her love for both of us, for
I knew well what a struggle it must have been to her to gain the mastery
over her proper pride and just resentment. I knelt down beside her,
clasping her hand and my mother's in my own.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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