"My child," said the curé to me, one evening, when his long day's work
was over, "your face is _triste_. What are you thinking of?"
I was seated under a thick-leaved sycamore, a few paces from the
church-porch. Vespers were just ended; the low chant had reached my
ears, and I missed the soothing undertone. The women, in their high
white caps, and the men, in their blue blouses, were sauntering slowly
homeward. The children were playing all down the village street, and not
far away a few girls and young men were beginning to dance to the piping
of a flute. Over the whole was creeping the golden twilight of a summer
evening.
"I am very _triste_" I replied; "I am thinking that it is time for me to
go away from you all. I cannot stay in this tranquil place."
"But wherefore must you leave us?" he asked, sitting down on the bench
beside me; "I found two little stray lambs, wandering without fold or
shepherd, and I brought them to my own house. What compels them to go
into the wide world again?"
"Monsieur, we are poor," I answered, "and you are not rich. We should be
a burden to you, and we have no claim upon you."
"You have a great claim," he said; "there is not a heart in the parish
that does not love you already. Have not our children died in your arms?
Have you not watched over them? spent sleepless nights and watchful days
for them? How could we endure to see you go away? Remain with us,
madame; live with us, you and my _mignonne_, whose face is white yet."
Could I stay then? It was a very calm, very secure refuge. There was no
danger of discovery. Yet there was a restlessness in my spirit at war
with the half-mournful, half-joyous serenity of the place, where I had
seen so many people die, and where there were so many new graves in the
little cemetery up the hill. If I could go away for a while, I might
return, and learn to be content amid this tranquillity.
"Madame," said the pleasant tones of Monsieur Laurentie, "do you know
our language well enough to tell me your history now? You need not prove
to me that you are not wicked; tell me how you are unfortunate. Where
were you wandering to that night when I found you at the foot of the
Calvary?"
There, in the cool, deepening twilight, I told him my story, little by
little; sometimes at a loss for words, and always compelled to speak in
the simplest and most direct phrases. He listened, with no other
interruption than to supply me occasionally with an expression when I
hesitated. He appeared to understand me almost by intuition. It was
quite dark before I had finished, and the deep blue of the sky above us
was bright with stars. A glow-worm was moving among the tufts of grass
growing between the roots of the tree; and I watched it almost as
intently as if I had nothing else to think of.
"Speak to me as if I were your daughter," I said. "Have I done right or
wrong? Would you give me up to him, if he came to claim me?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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