It must be a dreadful thing to be really sick in one of these places.
There seems to be no such thing as night, at least as a season of
repose. The same clatter of plates, knives, and glasses goes on; the
same ringing of bells, and scuffling sounds of running feet; waltzes
and polkas; wagons and mule-carts; donkeys and hurdy-gurdies; whistling
waiters and small puppies, with a weak falsetto, infest the air, and
make up a din that would addle the spirit of Pandemonium.
Hour after hour had I to lie listening to these, taking out my wrath
in curses upon Strauss and late suppers, and anathematizing the whole
family of opera writers, who have unquestionably originated the bleating
performances of every late bed-goer. Not a wretch toiled upstairs, at
four in the morning, without yelling out "Casta Diva," or "Gib, mir
wein." The half-tipsy ones were usually sentimental, and hiccuped the
"Tu che al cielo," out of the "Lucia."
To these succeeded the late sitters at the play-tables,--a race who,
to their honor be it recorded, never sing. Gambling is a grave
passion, and, whether a man win or lose, it takes all fun out of him. A
deep-muttered malediction upon bad luck, a false oath to play no more, a
hearty curse against Fortune were the only soliloquies of these the last
votaries of Pleasure that now sought their beds as day was breaking.
Have you ever stopped your ears, Tom, and looked at a room full of
people dancing? The effect is very curious. What was so graceful but
a moment back is now only grotesque. The plastic elegance of gesture
becomes downright absurdity. She who tripped with such fairy-like
lightness, or that other who floated with swan-like dignity, now seems
to move without purpose, and, stranger still, without grace. It was
the measure which gave the soul to the performance,--it was that mystic
accord, like what binds mind to matter, that gave the wondrous charm
to the whole; divested of this it was like motion without
vitality,--abrupt, mechanical, convulsive. Exactly the same kind of
effect is produced by witnessing fashionable amusements, with a spirit
untuned to pleasure. You know nothing of their motives, nor incentives
to enjoyment; you are not admitted to any participation in their plan or
their object, and to your eyes it is all "dancing without music."
I need not dwell on a tiresome theme, for such would be any description
of my life at Ems. Of my lovely companion I saw but little. About
midday her maid would bring me a few lines, written in pencil, with kind
inquiries after me. Later on I could detect the silvery music of her
voice, as she issued forth to her afternoon drive. Later again I could
hear her, as she passed along the corridor to her room; and then,
as night wore on, she would sometimes come to my door to say a few
words,--very kind ones, and in her own softest manner, but of which I
could recall nothing, so occupied was I with observing her in all the
splendor of evening dress.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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