"Pardon me," she said evenly. "I'm not often hysterical." She was
returning slowly. "I'll be glad when vacation comes. I think I'm--tired."
She seated herself and motioned the other back into his place,--a motion
that was a command. "Now, tell me, please, that you didn't mean what you
said a moment ago when we were both irresponsible. It will make us both
sleep better."
The smile had left Armstrong's face now, and in its place was the pallor
of reaction. But he was quiet also.
"I wish I could," he said steadily, "but I can't. It'll be exactly as it
was before."
The girl was still smiling,--that same normal, apparently effortless,
smile.
"Nonsense!" she refuted, in tones deliberately matter-of-fact. "There's
all the difference in the world. Before you had no audience. And
now--the entire country will listen now."
"It doesn't matter," dully. "It's always been you that counted really.
Success was an incident, but you were the real incentive."
"I?" She laughed gently. "On the contrary it was I who tried to lead you
away from your work, to make you practical. Don't you remember the Graham
offer?"
"Yes," hurriedly. "I've thought of it a thousand times. It was the big
mistake of my life when I refused his proposal. If I'd accepted then--"
"You'd not have been a successful writer whose work goes on sale to-day
in every city in the United States."
"Perhaps. But I would have had you. What do I care for success in
comparison to you!"
Listening, just for an instant the girl's nostrils tightened; again she
laughed.
"We seem to be travelling in a circle," she bantered, "and keep returning
to the starting-point. It's discouraging."
"It's written," said Armstrong, simply. "We can't avoid it. With me
you're the starting-point as you're the end, always. Didn't you recognize
yourself so in the last novel?"
The girl settled back in her seat wearily.
"You told me, I recall," she said.
"And in the one before?"
"You told me that also."
Armstrong was observing her steadily.
"You are in the new one too," he said; "the one I've been working on--but
which will never be completed now. You've killed the girl there too,
Elice."
"Steve!" The hands had gone swiftly to the girl's ears, covered them
completely. "I shan't listen. This is worse than folly. It's madness."
"I can't help it," monotonously. "It's myself. I can't avoid being
myself."
"Nor I myself, Steve," very gently. "Can't you realize that?"
The man passed his hand across his eyes as though brushing away something
tangible.
"No, I can't realize anything," he said dully, "except that I love
you--and have lost. This and that the world is dead--and I am alone in
it."
For the second time the girl arose, and even yet quite steadily. But at
last her lips were trembling.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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