"Yes, I'm sure you have and that's why I think you'll understand. As I say, I've got to tell someone or I'll burst. It's just this--it's my cousin Rachel--Lady Seddon. Ever since we first met in your room she's been my whole world. Nothing else has mattered. It's she that's kept me all these months from going under. She's my life, my whole existence now and in the world to come, if there is one. Oh! Thank God!" he cried. "I've told someone at last. If you don't approve I can't help it. I know you'll keep my secret and, after all, it's nothing very terrible. I'm content to go on like this, just seeing her sometimes, writing to her sometimes. Now you know, Miss Rand, what's been my secret all this time. I've felt it's been between us and that's why I had to tell you. We'll be twice the friends that we were now that I've told you. And I must, I _must_ have someone to talk to about her sometimes. It's been killing me, getting along without it." Now that he had begun words poured from him. He did not know that it was raining; he saw only Rachel with her white face and dark hair. Lizzie pulled her wrap about her; she was very cold and the rain was coming fast. He was suddenly conscious of this. "I say, what a brute I am! It's pouring!" He called a passing hansom and they climbed into it. He was aware that she had said nothing. "There!" he said, "you wish I hadn't told you. I know you do. You're shocked." "No," she said, struggling to prevent her teeth from chattering. He felt her shiver. "Why! you're shaking with cold! We oughtn't to have walked, but I did so want to speak to you about this. We must talk about it another time. But, I say, you aren't really horrified about it, are you?" "No," she said again. "Another time though--There must be thunder. This storm makes my head ache." She could say no more. The rest of the drive was in silence. In the hall she thanked him for her delightful evening. She looked through the drawing-room door and wished her mother and sister good night, but did not stay to discuss incidents. "Well," said Mrs. Rand, who had a fine list of questions ready about the play--"There's selfishness!" Lizzie locked her door, undressed and lay down. Like a sword jagging through and through her brain and piercing from there down to her heart stabbed the refrain: "Oh! I hate her! I hate her! I hate her!" So, wide-eyed, she lay throughout the night. CHAPTER VI ALL THE BEAMINSTERS "We must expect change," returned Mrs. Chick. "Of weather?" asked Miss Tox in her simplicity.