"I could see he was the man for you, not me. Right there I felt like
quitting. I went back to my hotel doing more thinking to the square
minute than ever before in my life, I reckon. I ought to have pulled out
for the mountains right then, but you see, I had caught a glimpse of
you again, and I couldn't. The smell of your dress----" he paused a
moment. "You are the finest girl God ever made and I just couldn't go
without seeing you, at least once more."
He was tense, almost rigid with the stress of his sudden passion. She
remained silent with eyes fixed upon him, musing and somber. She was
slower to utter emotion than he, and could not speak even when he had
finished.
He began to walk up and down just before her, his brows moodily knitted.
"I'm not fit to ask a girl like you to marry me, I know that. I've
served time in jail, and I'm under indictment by the courts this very
minute in two States. I'm no good on earth but to rope cattle. I can't
bring myself to farm or sell goods back here, and if I could you
oughtn't to have anything to do with me--but all the same you're worth
more to me than anything else. I don't suppose there has been an hour of
my life since I met you first that I haven't thought of you. I dreamed
of you--when I'm riding at night--I try to think----"
He stopped abruptly and caught up her left hand. "You've got a ring on
your finger--is that from the minister?"
Her eyes fled from his and she said, "Yes."
He dropped her hand. "I don't blame you any. I've made a failure of it."
His tone was that of a bankrupt at fifty. "I don't know enough to write
a letter--I'm only a rough, tough fool. I thought you'd be thinking of
me just the way I was thinking of you, and there was nothing to write
about because I wasn't getting ahead as I expected. So I kept waiting
till something turned up to encourage me. Nothing did, and now I'm paid
for it."
His voice had a quality which made her weep. She tried to think of some
words of comfort but could not. She was indeed too deeply concerned with
her own contending emotions. There was marvelous appeal in this
powerful, bronzed, undisciplined youth. His lack of tact and gallantry,
his disconcerting directness of look and speech shook her, troubled her,
and rendered her weak. She was but a year younger than he, and her life
had been almost as simple exteriorly, but at center she was of far finer
development. She had always been introspective, and she had grown
self-analytic. She knew that the touch of this young desperado's hand
had changed her relation toward the world. As he talked she listened
without formulating a reply.
When at last she began to speak she hesitated and her sentences were
broken. "I am very sorry--but you see I had not heard from you for a
long time--it would be impossible--for me to live on the plains so far
away--even if--even if I had not promised Mr. King----"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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