The East India Vade-Mecum, Volume 1 (of 2): or, complete guide to gentlemen intended for the civil, military, or naval service of the East India Company.Williamson, Thomas
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The East India Vade-Mecum, Volume 1 (of 2): or, complete guide to gentlemen intended for the civil, military, or naval service of the East India Company.
Williamson, Thomas
India -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Handbooks, manuals, etc.
‘Children, thus purchased, are, in general, extremely well used; there
being little distinction made between them and those of the family,
except in the trifling work they have to perform; when they are married,
and have children, the little ones always address the master and
mistress of the house with the familiar appellation of grandfather and
grandmother; and, indeed, are by them always considered in the light of
relations.
‘The following is a detailed account of their marriage ceremonies, as
written out at my request by a Mussulman friend of considerable
abilities and of a most liberal disposition.
‘When a daughter reaches the age of fourteen, some youth, of equal
condition, makes offers of marriage, by sending letters to the parents,
soliciting their favorable notice, (in Bengal the father himself looks
out for a proper match,) and begging they will admit him within the
chain of relationship. This letter is forwarded to the father in charge
of some friend, and never by the hands of a common messenger. The higher
the rank, and the greater the beauty, of the fair one, the more numerous
are the solicitors.
‘The parents, consulting together, and having made their selection,
return a favorable answer to the person approved of, and to the rest
such as the occasion demands. This is followed by a ring, and a dress,
being sent to the intended bridegroom, which, though it gives him an
assurance of ultimate success does not accelerate the consummation of
his wishes; for he has still a _Jacobian period_ to toil through in
service, and in attentions to the parents: nor is it before he has thus
evinced his subjection to their commands, and his devotion to their
interests, that their assent is given for the celebration of the
nuptials.
‘To give publicity to that assent, and to his own happiness on the
occasion the favored youth gives a great entertainment: the greater the
expence he incurs in preparation, the greater is supposed to be the
force of his love. The ordinary ceremonies take up three days (in Bengal
twenty-one). On the afternoon of the first day, about sun-set, a
cavalcade of the friends, male and female, of the bridegroom, issue
forth to present a dress, ornaments, and fruits of all kinds, to the
bride. The bridegroom always furnishes the marriage-dress, which arises
from a refined delicacy on both sides: on his, that he takes her for
herself alone; on her’s, or rather her parents, that she may not appear
like a loose woman, who ornaments herself on going abroad.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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