AEACUS. He has convicted you of lying and did not thrash the impudent rascal who had dared to call himself the master. XANTHIAS. Ah! he would have rued it if he had. AEACUS. Well spoken! that's a reply that does a slave credit; 'tis thus that I like to act too. XANTHIAS. How, pray? AEACUS. I am beside myself with joy, when I can curse my master in secret. XANTHIAS. And when you go off grumbling, after having been well thrashed? AEACUS. I am delighted. XANTHIAS. And when you make yourself important? AEACUS. I know of nothing sweeter. XANTHIAS. Ah! by Zeus! we are brothers. And when you are listening to what your masters are saying? AEACUS. 'Tis a pleasure that drives me to distraction. XANTHIAS. And when you repeat it to strangers? AEACUS. Oh! I feel as happy as if I were emitting semen. XANTHIAS. By Phoebus Apollo! reach me your hand; come hither, that I may embrace you; and, in the name of Zeus, the Thrashed one, tell me what all this noise means, these shouts, these quarrels, that I can hear going on inside yonder. AEACUS. 'Tis Aeschylus and Euripides. XANTHIAS. What do you mean? AEACUS. The matter is serious, very serious indeed; all Hades is in commotion. XANTHIAS. What's it all about? AEACUS. We have a law here, according to which, whoever in each of the great sciences and liberal arts beats all his rivals, is fed at the Prytaneum and sits at Pluto's side ... XANTHIAS. I know that. AEACUS. ... until someone cleverer than he in the same style of thing comes along; then he has to give way to him. XANTHIAS. And how has this law disturbed Aeschylus? AEACUS. He held the chair for tragedy, as being the greatest in his art. XANTHIAS. And who has it now? AEACUS. When Euripides descended here, he started reciting his verses to the cheats, cut-purses, parricides, and brigands, who abound in Hades; his supple and tortuous reasonings filled them with enthusiasm, and they pronounced him the cleverest by far. So Euripides, elated with pride, took possession of the throne on which Aeschylus was installed. XANTHIAS. And did he not get stoned? AEACUS. No, but the folk demanded loudly that a regular trial should decide to which of the two the highest place belonged. XANTHIAS. What folk? this mob of rascals? (_Points to the spectators._) AEACUS. Their clamour reached right up to heaven. XANTHIAS. And had Aeschylus not his friends too? AEACUS. Good people are very scarce here, just the same as on earth. XANTHIAS. What does Pluto reckon to do? AEACUS. To open a contest as soon as possible; the two rivals will show their skill, and finally a verdict will be given. XANTHIAS. What! has not Sophocles also claimed the chair then?