At one time, she had greatly occupied herself with this thought. Sitting
comfortably in her box at the theatre, she had wondered whether it was
right that the actors should play, sing, and dance for her amusement;
that cab-drivers should freeze for hours outside the theatre doors, on
the chance of driving her home; that the night porter of her house should
get out of bed to let her in—all this for trifling sums of money that
she could never even miss, and that she had received from her father.
Was it not an impossible arrangement of society, by which so many people
worked for one idler? The question had greatly disturbed Irene’s peace
of mind; but just at that time she had been asked to join a society
for providing poor young mothers with layettes for their babies. The
object of this society was pleasing to Irene, and all her disturbing
thoughts had lost themselves in an enormous ardour for knitting babies’
counterpanes. There is scarcely another manual occupation that needs
as little attention as knitting. One can knit a whole counterpane so
mechanically that one has hardly noticed how it happened. And so, Irene
had knitted and knitted during all the long winter evenings, while her
thoughts had rushed from one fancy to another. She had reorganized the
Russian army and fleet; she had thought out schools of a new type, from
which issued the most remarkable, active, energetic people; she had
rebuilt Petrograd; she had planned new railways and laid out a new
network of canals, uniting all Russia’s inland seas.
And all the time, the counterpanes had grown and grown, till at last
Irene had been able proudly to present an enormous number of completed
ones to the society. She had been happy in the thought that if the
workmen of Petrograd provided her with all the necessaries of life, she
in return provided their children with counterpanes. In this way, justice
and an even balance had been restored.
It is true that the society had also imposed on its members the duty of
visiting the mothers. This duty, however, Irene had point blank refused
to take upon herself. It was preposterous, she had thought. What would
happen if she were by chance to arrive somewhere at a moment when a
child was being born? She would hear the mother’s groans and see the
red, wrinkled infant. She did not even know very exactly how it all
happens, and she had shuddered at the very idea of witnessing anything
so nauseating. In general, she had always felt a natural disgust for
everything physical, and had never brought herself to glance without a
shudder at the simplest anatomical design. In the case in point, indeed,
she had preferred to knit ten extra counterpanes rather than see one of
the babies for whom they were destined.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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