When no one saw him he kept this stealthy watch. In the daytime, with
the others about, he still was careful to preserve his brusque
indifference, to avoid her, to hide his passion with a jealous
subtlety. But beneath the imposed bonds it grew with each day,
stronger and more savage as the way waxed fiercer. It was not an
obsession of occasional moments, it was always with him. As pilot her
image moved across the waste before him. When he fell back for words
with Daddy John, he was listening through the old man's speech, for the
fall of her horse's hoofs. Her voice made his heart stop, the rustle
of her garments dried his throat. When his lowered eyes saw her hand
on the plate's edge, he grew rigid, unable to eat. If she brushed by
him in the bustle of camp pitching, his hands lost their strength and
he was sick with the sense of her. Love, courtship, marriage, were
words that no longer had any meaning for him. All the tenderness and
humanity he had felt for her in the days of her father's sickness were
gone. They were burned away, as the water and the grass were. When he
saw her solicitude for David, his contempt for the weak man hardened
into hatred. He told himself that he hated them both, and he told
himself he would crush and kill them both before David should get her.
The desire to keep her from David was stronger than the desire to have
her for himself. He did not think or care what he felt. She was the
prey to be won by cunning or daring, whose taste or wishes had no place
in the struggle. He no longer looked ahead, thought, or reasoned. The
elemental in him was developing to fit a scene in which only the
elemental survived.
They broke camp at four the next morning. For the last few days the
heat had been unbearable, and they decided to start while the air was
still cool and prolong the noon halt. The landscape grew barer. There
were open areas where the soil was soft and sifted from the wheels like
sand, and dried stretches where the alkali lay in a caked, white crust.
In one place the earth humped into long, wavelike swells each crest
topped with a fringe of brush, fine and feathery as petrified spray.
At mid-day there was no water in sight. Courant, standing on his
saddle, saw no promise of it, nothing but the level distance streaked
with white mountain rims, and far to the south a patch of yellow--bare
sand, he said, as he pointed a horny finger to where it lay.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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