finger of one hand in the hole at the bottom of the bottle, and my t'other hand being employed in holding the bottle, and being stooping at the Cock of the Cistern my Mistress came near me, and there standing by me in a Tub a parcel of durty clouts wherewith the maids had newly washed down the stairs, she takes them up and slaps them about my face, so that I looked as durty as a Chimney-sweeper; and not contented therewith, she jouled my head against the Cistern: I thereupon standing upright, and feling my self wet, faced her, who now opening her mouth, made a great noise with her passionate exclamations against me for abusing her Son; I let her goe on in her discourse, and apprehending a way to be even with her, coming very near her, let my finger go from the bottom of the bottle, and holding it over her, it ran all upon her, so that she then having a great belly soon felt her self to wet through, and then she would have been at me again, but I shewed her a fair pair of heels, and ran away. Thus was I still even with them both, and my Master would seldom do any thing but laugh at what I did, taking much notice of my unhappy wit; for let her and her Son do all they could, I would be sure to have my share of the best sort of the Victuals; and she was of that dirty humor, that at a _Christmas_ when she made a Feast, and a great deal of good chear was drest for her guests, she would then afford us nothing but a dish of stew’d Turneps, Milk, Pottage, or at the best, a leg of Beef; and though much Victuals were left in Platters, and on Trenchers, that she bestowed on the Water-bearer or Chair-woman, that they might report what a brave House she kept, and not a bit was given to us his Servants, unless she had kept it so long till it was mouldy or worse. Once I remember she promised us some Plumb-Pottage, and at the time she made two pots full, I asking the maid wherefore so much was made? she informed me, that one pot-full was much better than the other; I being told which was the best when my Master and Mistress were at Dinner, got a good Bason full of the best, and set it by for my self, and then mixed the rest so, so that we had all alike. But to lay aside all these fooleries, and now to the purpose, my Master perceiving me of a pretty smart wit, and fit for his purpose, he employed me in getting of a Seal made, the which I did, and it was like unto the Companies, which I told you was to the writing, upon which we lent 500_l._ He did not tell me the use of it at present, but I soon found it out; for not long after a Deed was made, and the Seal being put to it, my Master caused one who was his Confederate to bring it to our shop at such a time as he had a Usurer in his company who wanted security for moneys. In comes our Gentleman, and calling my Master aside, asked him if he could procure 500_l._ upon such a Companies Lease? Yes reply’d my Master if it be a good one; whereupon the Lease was produced, and the Usurer