Although he was a great Drinker, yet he did fight cunningly, and would not let one drop of Wine go down his belly in the morning, nor hardly admit of any mornings-draught though never so moderate; forbearing all drinking, till the affairs of the Gut, the eating were over; and then, as he used to say, it would do your heart good to see him take off his Liquor, especially Sack, which was his chiefest delight; and he would bear it very lustily, and with the help of a Coach get to his Lodging in very good order. But one time he had missed and omitted this custom, and drank all day without eating, so that the next morning his belly and head were both filled with airy humours, his belly asked and croaked, and his head was giddy, wanting settlement; wherefore, some Friends who came to visit him, advised him to drink some _Coffee_; he believing that in regard it was to be drunk hot, that it might heat his Guts, and qualifie his brain went to a _Coffee_-house with them; where being sat down, and having put two warm dishes full into his Guts, it made him break wind forwards and backwards both; at which unusual noise among so many people as were there together, he was more than usually stared at; he minded not their staring, but continued in drinking; and withal observed the several postures used in drinking their _Coffee_; some he saw laid their Nose, some their eyes, nay, and some their ears to the _Coffee_-dish, to let the smoak, or fume of the _Coffee_ ascend; at this unusual sight he asked the reason of it; and it was generally replyed, that it was an excellent remedy against the Cold which they had gotten in those parts; he hearing them say so, had an extravagant humour come into his brain; and I dare say, if the Company would have given him twenty pound, he would not have forborn the execution of it; but thus proceeded: He called for the largest Dish of _Coffee_ in the house; it being filled, he set it in the middle of the _Coffee_-room, and letting down his Breeches, he turned up his shirt, and placed his Bum just over the _Coffee_-dish. All the Company wondring and laughing at this Extravagancie; he cryed out, Nay, Gentlemen, you need not laugh so hard, for I do no otherwise then you have directed me, for you all say _Coffee_ is good for a Cold, and to your knowledg my _Podea_ had gotten a Cold, for it coughed since I came in hither; and therefore do but as I was directed, to let the fumes of the _Coffee_ asend to the place affected. Having now had his frollick, he put up his Breeches, and sitting down among the Company, gave them all occasion to exercise their eyes in staring on him; and he again entertained them with such fantastical discourse, as made them believe that he was more Knave than Fool, and enough of both.