Which was thus, One night I caused my self to be brought home by a Porter as dead drunk; my Wife received me in that condition (I perceived by peeping out of my eye-lids) with much satisfaction, and was immediately carried up to bed; with much difficulty they undrest me, pretending my self asleep all this while, and so they left me. It seems by the story that my Wife presently sent away the Maid (which was her Pimp) to her friend to come at such an hour. About nine of the clock the Maid was posted to bed; and about ten I heard one small knock at the door: he needed not to knock there any longer, for there was one below that was ready to receive him. When I judg’d they were incircled in each others arms, (which I understood by hearkning at the bottom of the stairs, and thereby knew whereabout they were) I ran in upon them with my Sword (which I had prepared ready) & thinking to have run them through the body, intending to make a passage for their Souls escape, I past my Sword through the fleshy part of both their thighs. At which they made a most hideous outcry, so that the Maid came running down: and a Watchman that stood just at my door hearing the noise, knockt at the door, to know what was the matter; the Maid apprehending the danger, let him in, who by the help of his Candle, never saw so strange a sight; for I had so pin’d them together, that they could not stir. As well as they could speak, they both begg’d their pardon for their lives only, which I granted, as looking on my revenge somewhat satisfied. My Gentleman I dismist, but as for his Mistress I was forced to send for a Chyrurgeon, whose wound needed no probing, but tenting, for it was through and through. There was no concealing of what was done; wherefore in the morning early I acquainted her Parents with what had happen’d last night, insisting further, that since she had instead of putting off handsomly the Chain of Matrimony, rudely broke it, it should be her own damage; neither would I be at the cost of a visitation to repair the breach. To which I added, that had I deny’d her things requisite and necessary, or not performed duly my duty, she might have had some pretence for her slighting me, and look upon me only as a false Crow set up in a Garden, to keep others from the fruit it cannot taste it self. But since it was otherwise, and that she had nothing to object against me, but onely sometimes curbing her inordinate desires; I wisht them to save me the labour of having the Law to tear her from me, but that they would remove her elsewhere.