she so stunk of Strong-waters, stronger then that Cask that never contained any thing else; I went down all along to the Cross, in my way I saw many Whores standing at their doors, giving me invitation; but being poor, they could not afford the charge of _Fucus_, so that their faces lookt much like a piece of rumbled Parchment, and by their continual traffick with Seamens Breeches, I could not come near them, they smelt so strongly of Tarpawlin and stinking Cod; yet still no tidings of her I sought for. From hence I went to _Fleet-yard_, but there they were so dawbed or plaistered with paint, & botcht with patches, that had I seen her there, it was impossible for me to have known her. Away I went to _Luteners-lane_, _Sodom_, and _Dog_ and _Bitch-yard_; but the Pox, it seemed, had not yet fitted her for those places. From hence I went to _Whetstons-Park_, where I saw my Mad-dame standing at the door: her frequent trading, and those many shots she had received between wind and water in the service, had so altered her countenance, and disproportioned her body, that I knew not whether this Frigate was English or Flemish built: but at last, hailing whence she was, I boarded her, and made her lawful prize: mistake me not, I rummag’d not in her Hold, fearing she was a Fire-ship. The sight and knowledge of me, made her shed some Babylonish tears, which I took little notice of, knowing them to be either customary to that Sex, or the effects of a moist brain. In we went together, where we had, according to the custom of the house, Pint-black-pots of small Ale for two pence, and quarterns of Strong-water half fill’d for six pence, with Biskets; which as soon as brought, every one broken, though not a bit afterwards eaten. We must be smoaking too, though the Pipe must be thrown down carelesly, and often broken as soon as put to the lips: one of the Plyers being gone down to draw some more drink, she begged me to conceal my self for the present, and comply also with the cheating customs of the house, and she would willingly pay all. I had hardly smoakt two whiffs more, but that a fellow came where we were, swearing _dam-me_, why do you stay with this fellow, and leave me thus, you unconstant Quean? have I spent my estate on you, and must you now grow weary of me? and with that drew his knife, making a proffer to cut her nose off. I was so amazed at what I heard, and so irritated by passion, that I knew not which of them to be revenged on first. Sir, said I, I have been longer acquainted with her then you, and may justly claim a better title and more priviledge; but as you have affronted me, so I shall require satisfaction instantly, not referring our difference to be decided by the field, an Umpire that Cowards frequently make choice of: so drawing my knife also, and seizing on his nose, which I intended to have divorc’d from his face, I was prevented, for it dropt off into my hand. This accident so astonisht me, and withal being much affrighted at