[26] It was in this state of mind, while in momentary expectation of receiving an account of the termination of the court-martial, that Heywood's charming sister Nessy wrote the following lines:-- ANXIETY. Doubting, dreading, fretful guest, Quit, oh I quit this mortal breast. Why wilt thou my peace invade, And each brighter prospect shade? Pain me not with needless Fear, But let Hope my bosom cheer; While I court her gentle charms, Woo the flatterer to my arms; While each moment she beguiles With her sweet enliv'ning smiles, While she softly whispers me, 'Lycidas again is free,' While I gaze on Pleasure's gleam, Say not thou 'Tis all a dream.' Hence--nor darken Joy's soft bloom With thy pale and sickly gloom: Nought have I to do with thee-- Hence--begone--Anxiety. _Isle of Man, September 10th._ NESSY HEYWOOD. [27] This is supposed to allude to the evidence given by Hallet. [28] This refers to a very kind and encouraging letter written to him by the Rev. Dr. Scott, of the Isle of Man, who knew him from a boy, and had the highest opinion of his character. [29] Captain Bligh states in his journal, that none of his officers were suffered to come near him while held a prisoner by Christian; and Hallet was, no doubt, mistaken, but he had probably said it in the boat, and thought it right to be consistent on the trial. It has been said that Hallet, when in the _Penelope_, in which frigate he died, expressed great regret at the evidence he had given at the court-martial, and frequently alluded to it, admitting that he might have been mistaken. There can be very little doubt that he was so. But the Editor has ascertained, from personal inquiry of one of the most distinguished flag-officers in the service, who was then first lieutenant of the _Penelope_, that Hallet frequently expressed to him his deep contrition for having given in evidence what, on subsequent reflection, he was convinced to be incorrect; that he ascribed it to the state of confusion in which his mind was when under examination before the Court; and that he had since satisfied himself that, owing to the general alarm and confusion during the mutiny, he must have confounded Heywood with some other person. [30] Vol. ii. p. 778. [31] Some few captains were in the habit of turning over a delinquent to be tried by their messmates, and when found guilty, it invariably happened that the punishment inflicted was doubly severe to what it would have been in the ordinary way. This practice,--which, as giving a deliberative voice to the ship's company, was highly reprehensible,--it is to be hoped has entirely ceased. [32] Information that the pardon was gone down to Portsmouth. [33] She had received, previous to this, information of what the event would be, and thus gives vent to her feelings.