My Uncle has of late become the sole Discourse of all the country; for of a man respected As master of a govern’d family, The House (as if the ridge were fix’d below, And groundsils lifted up to make the roof) All now’s turn’d topsy-turvy, In such a retrograde and preposterous way As seldom hath been heard of, I think never. The Good Man In all obedience kneels unto his Son; He with an austere brow commands his Father. The Wife presumes not in the Daughter’s sight Without a prepared curtsy; the Girl she Expects it as a duty; chides her Mother, Who quakes and trembles at each word she speaks. And what’s as strange, the Maid--she domineers O’er her young Mistress, who is awed by her. The Son, to whom the Father creeps and bends, Stands in as much fear of the groom his Man! All in such rare disorder, that in some As it breeds pity, and in others wonder, So in the most part laughter. It is thought, This comes by WITCHCRAFT. * * * * * [From “Wit in a Constable,” a Comedy, by Henry Glapthorn.] _Books._ _Collegian._ Did you, ere we departed from the College, O’erlook my Library? _Servant._ Yes, Sir; and I find, Altho’ you tell me Learning is immortal, The paper and the parchment ’tis contain’d in Savours of much mortality. The moths have eaten more Authentic Learning, than would richly furnish A hundred country pedants; yet the worms Are not one letter wiser. C. L. * * * * * THE TURK IN CHEAPSIDE _For the Table Book._ TO MR. CHARLES LAMB. I have a favour to ask of you. My desire is this: I would fain see a stream from thy Hippocrene flowing through the pages of the _Table Book_. A short article on the old Turk, who used to vend rhubarb in the City, I greatly desiderate. Methinks you would handle the subject delightfully. They tell us he is gone---- We have not seen him for some time past--Is he really dead? Must we hereafter speak of him only in the past tense? You are said to have divers strange items in your brain about him--Vent them I beseech you. Poor Mummy!--How many hours hath he dreamt away on the sunny side of Cheap, with an opium cud in his cheek, mutely proffering his drug to the way-farers! That deep-toned bell above him, doubtless, hath often brought to his recollection the loud Allah-il-Allahs to which he listened heretofore in his fatherland--the city of minaret and mosque, old Constantinople. Will he never again be greeted by the nodding steeple of Bow?--Perhaps that ancient beldame, with her threatening head and loud tongue, at length effrayed the sallow being out of existence.