The ExplorerMaugham, W. Somerset (William Somerset)
General
The Explorer
Maugham, W. Somerset (William Somerset)
British -- Africa -- Fiction; England -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
Lucy read his letters over and over again. She could not understand
them, and they seemed strangely indifferent. At that distance from the
scene of the disaster she could not realise its absorbing anxiety, and
she was bitterly disappointed at Alec's absence. She wanted his presence
so badly, and she had to bear alone, on her own shoulders, the full
weight of her trouble. When Macinnery's second letter appeared, Lady
Kelsey gave it to her without a word. It was awful. The whole thing was
preposterous, but it hung together in a way that was maddening, and
there was an air of truth about it which terrified her. And why should
Alec insist on this impenetrable silence? She had offered herself the
suggestion that political exigencies with regard to the states whose
spheres of influence bordered upon the territory which Alec had
conquered, demanded the strictest reserve; but this explanation soon
appeared fantastic. She read all that was said in the papers and found
that opinion was dead against Alec. Now that it was become a party
matter, his own side defended him; but in a half-hearted way, which
showed how poor the case was. And since all that could be urged in his
favour, Lucy had already repeated to herself a thousand times, what was
said against him seemed infinitely more conclusive than what was said
for him. And then her conscience smote her. Those cruel words of
Bobbie's came back to her, and she was overwhelmed with self-reproach
when she considered that it was her own brother of whom was all this
to-do. She must be utterly heartless or utterly depraved. And then with
a despairing energy she cried out that she believed in Alec; he was
incapable of a treacherous act.
At last she could bear it no longer, and she wired to him: _For God's
sake come quickly_.
She felt that she could not endure another day of this misery. She
waited for him, given over to the wildest fears; she was ashamed and
humiliated. She counted the hours which must pass before he could
arrive; surely he would not delay. All her self-possession had vanished,
and she was like a child longing for the protecting arms that should
enfold it
* * *
At last he came. Lucy was waiting in the same room in which she had sat
on their first meeting after his return to England. She sprang up, pale
and eager, and flung herself passionately into his arms.
'Thank God, you've come,' she said. 'I thought the hours would never
end.'
He did not know what so vehemently disturbed her, but he kissed her
tenderly, and on a sudden she felt strangely comforted. There was an
extraordinary honesty about him which strengthened and consoled her. For
a while she could not speak, but clung to him, sobbing.
'What is it?' he asked at length. 'Why did you send for me?'
'I want your love. I want your love so badly.'
It was inconceivable, the exquisite tenderness with which he caressed
her. No one would have thought that dour man capable of such gentleness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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