Our present domestic life seems to me to stand sorely in need of Paul's
injunction. One cannot but see that there is great laxity in this matter
in many Christian households, in reaction perhaps from the too great
severity of past times. Many causes lead to this unwholesome relaxation
of parental authority. In our great cities, especially among the
commercial classes, children are generally better educated than their
fathers and mothers, they know less of early struggles, and one often
sees a sense of inferiority making a parent hesitate to command, as well
as a misplaced tenderness making him hesitate to forbid. A very
misplaced and cruel tenderness it is to say "would you like?" when he
ought to say "I wish." It is unkind to lay on young shoulders "the
weight of too much liberty," and to introduce young hearts too soon to
the sad responsibility of choosing between good and evil. It were better
and more loving by far to put off that day, and to let the children feel
that in the safe nest of home, their feeble and ignorant goodness is
sheltered behind a strong barrier of command, and their lives simplified
by having the one duty of obedience. By many parents the advice is
needed--consult your children less, command them more.
And as for children, here is the one thing which God would have them do:
"Obey your parents in all things." As fathers used to say when I was a
boy--"not only obedience, but prompt obedience." It is right. That
should be enough. But children may also remember that it is
"pleasing"--fair and good to see, making them agreeable in the eyes of
all whose approbation is worth having, and pleasing to themselves,
saving them from many a bitter thought in after days, when the grave has
closed over father and mother. One remembers the story of how Dr.
Johnson, when a man, stood in the market place at Lichfield, bareheaded,
with the rain pouring on him, in remorseful remembrance of boyish
disobedience to his dead father. There is nothing bitterer than the too
late tears for wrongs done to those who are gone beyond the reach of our
penitence. "Children obey your parents in all things," that you may be
spared the sting of conscience for childish faults, which may be set
tingling and smarting again even in old age.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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