The extraordinary confessions of Diana PleaseCapes, Bernard
General
The extraordinary confessions of Diana Please
Capes, Bernard
Femmes fatales -- Fiction; France -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Naples (Kingdom) -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
“Well,” said I, “I’m glad you stopped short of the beating. It would
only have stiffened me, like cream.”
“Whipt cream is very good with cherries,” said he, and bent to my
lips.
But I started from him gaily, and leapt to my feet.
“Come,” I said; “I’m waiting to be introduced to Mr. Portlock.”
He laughed, and stretched himself, and, rising, stooped to the hole in
the wall and scratched with his finger, like a rat gnawing, on the
iron stop therein. In a little something was withdrawn, and a weak
wash of light flowed through.
“Now,” said he, “I will go first, and do you follow, little mouse.”
He dropped on his hands and knees, and crawled in, and disappeared. It
was an attitude that lacked romance, and I was glad there was none
behind to witness my passing. But the journey was so short that I was
hardly in before my head was free on the farther side; and in a moment
George had helped me to my feet, and I saw our host.
I saw nothing else, indeed. There were, I believe, the open range, and
herb-hung rafters, and settle and dresser of the ordinary cottager’s
kitchen. The huge creature before me absorbed three-fourths of the
field of my vision. I understood at once why Mahomet must come to the
mountain.
He had an enormous tallowy face, had this person, with an expression
so excessively melting that it might have been said to be no
expression at all. He could have had no more intimacy with his own
skeleton than a hippopotamus. Ages ago he must have left it buried
within himself as useless, and turned his wits to balancing on the
twin globes of fat that were his legs. His eyes were slits, his nose a
wart, his mouth the mere orifice of a blow-pipe. If his neck by any
possibility had been broken, one might have stretched it till his head
touched the ceiling.
I was conscious of George standing by watching me, and instinctively I
dropped a curtsey. Immediately the mountain rumbled, and dusted a
chair for my reception. It swung in his vast hand like a signboard
from an inn. Relatively, I had some fear of sitting on it; it looked
for a moment so like a doll’s.
“Mr. Portlock,” I murmured, casting down my eyes, “I--I am your humble
servant, sir.”
He bowed--bagged, would be the better expression. The whole weight of
his chin was against his recovery; but he managed it, with an effort.
“You--you are very good to give me shelter,” said I. “I’m afraid
we--we shall crowd you dreadfully, sir.”
A low gale vibrated in him somewhere. I seemed to be able to detach
certain indistinct utterances from it, of which “welcome: what can do:
Maid Marian” were the clearest.
I made an effort to respond fitly--struggled, and was dumb. Then, in a
moment--I saw George with his hand to his mouth--the demon exploded in
me.
“Were you--were you always like that?” I shrieked, and fell across my
chair-back, half hysteric.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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