“All the same, I would rather have been a working man,” continued
Claude. “Look at the carpenters, for instance. They are very happy
folks, the carpenters. They have a table to make, say; well, they make
it, and then go off to bed, happy at having finished the table, and
perfectly satisfied with themselves. Now I, on the other hand, scarcely
get any sleep at nights. All those confounded pictures which I can’t
finish go flying about my brain. I never get anything finished and done
with—never, never!”
His voice almost broke into a sob. Then he attempted to laugh; and
afterwards began to swear and pour forth coarse expressions, with the
cold rage of one who, endowed with a delicate, sensitive mind, doubts
his own powers, and dreams of wallowing in the mire. He ended by
squatting down before one of the gratings which admit air into the
cellars beneath the markets—cellars where the gas is continually kept
burning. And in the depths below he pointed out Marjolin and Cadine
tranquilly eating their supper, whilst seated on one of the stone
blocks used for killing the poultry. The two young vagabonds had
discovered a means of hiding themselves and making themselves at home
in the cellars after the doors had been closed.
“What a magnificent animal he is, eh!” exclaimed Claude, with envious
admiration, speaking of Marjolin. “He and Cadine are happy, at all
events! All they care for is eating and kissing. They haven’t a care in
the world. Ah, you do quite right, after all, to remain at the pork
shop; perhaps you’ll grow sleek and plump there.”
Then he suddenly went off. Florent climbed up to his garret, disturbed
by Claude’s nervous restlessness, which revived his own uncertainty. On
the morrow, he avoided the pork shop all the morning, and went for a
long walk on the quays. When he returned to lunch, however, he was
struck by Lisa’s kindliness. Without any undue insistence she again
spoke to him about the inspectorship, as of something which was well
worth his consideration. As he listened to her, with a full plate in
front of him, he was affected, in spite of himself, by the prim comfort
of his surroundings. The matting beneath his feet seemed very soft; the
gleams of the brass hanging lamp, the soft, yellow tint of the
wallpaper, and the bright oak of the furniture filled him with
appreciation of a life spent in comfort, which disturbed his notions of
right and wrong. He still, however, had sufficient strength to persist
in his refusal, and repeated his reasons; albeit conscious of the bad
taste he was showing in thus ostentatiously parading his animosity and
obstinacy in such a place. Lisa showed no signs of vexation; on the
contrary, she smiled, and the sweetness of her smile embarrassed
Florent far more than her suppressed irritation of the previous
evening. At dinner the subject was not renewed; they talked solely of
the great winter saltings, which would keep the whole staff of the
establishment busily employed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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