The Fool Errant: Being the Memoirs of Francis-Anthony Strelley, Esq., Citizen of LuccaHewlett, Maurice
General
The Fool Errant: Being the Memoirs of Francis-Anthony Strelley, Esq., Citizen of Lucca
Hewlett, Maurice
Historical fiction
chamber door, upon his marriage night; or even at his last hour, when
the sands are nearly run and the priest has done his best, and before
him lies all that dark unexplored plain he must travel alone. I breathed
no articulated prayer, all my being prayed, every pulse and current in
my body, every urgency of my soul tended upwards to my advocate and
guardian in heaven. I bowed my head, I made the sign of the Cross, I
pushed the curtains and went in. Before me stretched a vast and empty
church, desolate exceedingly, at the far end of which, in the gloomy
fog, before a lamp-lit altar I saw a woman kneeling stiffly, with
uplifted head, as if she watched, not prayed--watched there and waited,
knowing full well the hour was come and the man.
Her head was hooded in a dark handkerchief; I could see her thin hands
clasped together--on the altar-rail; even as I realised these things
about her (which, besides her rigid, unprayerful pose, were all there
were to see) I must admit to myself that she bore no resemblance to my
lady. That one matter of devotion, and the devotional attitude were
enough to condemn her. For Aurelia was no bargainer in church, but lent
herself unreservedly to the holy commerce--her generous body, her ardent
soul--and asked no interest for the usufruct. Have I not seen her rain
kisses upon the tomb of St. Antony more passionately than I could have
dared upon her hand? Had she ever risen from the outpouring of prayer
without the dew of happy tears to bear witness in her eyes to her riven
heart? Her piety was, indeed, her great indulgence, so eager, so
luxurious, pursued with such appetite as I have never seen in England or
France, nor (assuredly) in Padua, where there is no zest, but much
decorum, in the practice of religion. To see her in church was, as it
were, to see a child in her mother's lap--able to laugh, to play, to
sulk and pout, ah, and to tell a fib, being so sure of forgiveness! No
secret too childish to be kept back, no trouble too light; the mustiness
of the season's oil, the shocking price of potherbs, the delinquency of
the milliner's apprentice who had spoiled a breadth of silk. She could
grumble at her husband, or impart and expect heaven to share her delight
at some little kindness he had done her. Since I have heard her speak
calmly to the Madonna about some young gentleman who had followed her
three days running to Mass, I am very sure that she and Our Lady were in
full agreement on my account. Thus it was that she, who had been early
parted from her earthly parents, nestled into the arms of her heavenly
parents. Upon what warm waves of feeling would Aurelia float into the
bosom of the Mother of Sorrows! With what endearments use her, with what
long kisses coax her for little mercies, with what fine confidence
promise her little rewards! And to compare this passionate flooding of
heart and mind, of corporeal and spiritual faculty with any incense
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