A nearly finished Faun, the head of a Niobe, the arm and hand of a Jove
launching a thunderbolt, the torso of a dead sailor after shipwreck, lay
amid fragments of shattered figures, grotesque images, some caricatures
of his own works, and crude models of anatomy. The walls were
scrawled with charcoal drawings of groups,--one day to be fashioned
in sculpture,--with verses from Dante, or lines from Tasso, inscribed
beneath; proud resolves to a life of labor figured beside stanzas in
praise of indolence and dreamy abandonment. There were passages of
Scripture, too, glorious bursts of the poetic rapture of the Psalms,
intermingled with quaint remarks on life from Jean Paul or Herder. All
that a discordant, incoherent nature consisted of was there in some
shape or other depicted; and as Billy ran his eye over this curious
journal,--for such it was,--he grieved over the spirit which had
dictated it.
The whole object of all his teaching had been to give a purpose to this
uncertain and wavering nature, and yet everything showed him now that
he had failed. The blight which had destroyed the boy's early fortunes
still worked its evil influences, poisoning every healthful effort, and
dashing with a sense of shame every successful step towards fame and
honor.
“Maybe he's right after all,” muttered Billy to himself. “The New World
is the only place for those who have not the roots of an ancient stock
to hold them in the Old. Men can be there whatever is in them, and they
can be judged without the prejudices of a class.”
Having summed up, as it were, his own doubts in this remark, he
proceeded with his task. While he was thus occupied, Massy entered, and
threw himself into a chair.
“There, you may give it up, Traynor. Fate is ever against us, do and
decide on what we will. Your confounded omen of a Friday was right this
time.”
“What do you mean? Have you altered your mind?”
“I expected you to say so,” said the other, bitterly. “I knew that I
should meet with this mockery of my resolution, but it is uncalled for.
It is not I that have changed!”
“What is it, then, has happened,--do they refuse your passport?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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