Self-disgust and shame are not identical but are so kindred that
shame may well be studied here. Shame is lowered self-valuation,
brought on by social or self-disapproval. Usually it is acute
and, like fear, it tends to make the individual hide or fly. It
is based on insight, and there are thus some who are never
ashamed, simply because they do not understand disapproval. Shame
is essentially a feeling of inferiority, and when we say to a
man, "Shame on you," we say, "You have done wrong, humble
yourself, be little!" When we say, "I am ashamed of you," we say,
"I had pride in you; I enlarged myself through you, and now you
make me little." When the community cries shame, it uses a force
that redresses wrong by the need of the one addressed to
vindicate himself. When a man feels shame he feels small,
inferior in his own eyes and in the eyes of others. He feels
impelled, if he is generous, to make amends or to do penance, and
thus he recovers his self-esteem. Unfortunately, shame arises
more frequently and often more violently from a violation of
custom and manner than from a violation of ethics or morals. Thus
we are more ashamed of the so-called "bad break" than of our
failures to be kind. Sometimes our fellow feeling is so strong
that we avoid seeing any one who is humiliated or embarrassed,
because sympathy spreads his feeling to us. Gentle people are
those who dislike to shame any one else, and often one of this
type will endure being wronged rather than reprimand or cause
humiliation and shame. Let something be said to shame any member
of a company and a feeling of shame spreads through the group,
except in the case of those who are very hostile.
Disgust, too, is extremely contagious, especially its
manifestations. One of the most crude of all manifestations, to
spit upon some one, is a symbol taken from disgust, though it has
come to mean contempt, which is a mixture of hatred and disgust.
To raise the tastes and not raise the acquisitions is a sure way
to bring about chronic disgust, which is really an angry
dissatisfaction mixed with disgust. This type of reaction is very
common as a factor in neurasthenia. In fact, my motto is "search
for the disgust" in all cases of neurasthenia and "search for it
in the intimate often secret desires and relationships. Seek for
it in the husband-wife relationship, especially from the
standpoint of the wife." Women, we say, are more refined in their
feelings than men, which is another way of saying they are more
easily disgusted and therefore more easily injured. For disgust
is an injury, when chronic or too easily elicited, and is then a
sign and symbol of weakness.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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