Sussex (England) -- Fiction; World War, 1914-1918 -- England -- Fiction
He shrugged his shoulders, and her heart sickened with jealousy,
knowing that her loss to him could not be so serious as his to her,
since he had his beautiful pale Bess, with her red hair and stooping
back, whom all the time he had loved more than he loved Ivy, because
she was his children’s mother and had rights which he respected. He
would soon forget Ivy; perhaps he would find another girl to solace
his spare hours, but anyhow he would forget her. The thought almost
made her hold him back, cling to him, and seek to wrest him from the
other woman with her self-confident possession. But she was withheld
by her sense of outrage, and by a queer pride she had always had in
herself, a rustic straightness which had gone with her through all
her many amours. To surrender now could only mean disgrace, since
she felt that in some odd way it meant surrender to Bess as well as
to Bess’s master. If she became Seagrim’s woman, which she must be
now, or nothing, Bess would somehow triumph, and triumph more utterly
than if she threw him off with scorn. Besides, he had fooled her and
lied to her; he was not worth having—let him go, though her heart
bled, and her bowels ached, as she watched him march off away from
her, shaking his shoulders in jaunty swagger, the sunlight gleaming
on his grizzled hair, the curls she had loved to pull. She could have
called him back, and he would have come, but her lips were shut and
her throat was dry. He vanished round a bend of the path, and all
that was left of him was a crunching footstep, heavy on last year’s
leaves. Then that too was gone, and with a little moan Ivy slid down
among the foxgloves and bennets, and sobbed with her forehead against
the earth.
6
After a little while she pulled herself up and wiped her eyes. Her
head ached and Twelve Pound Wood was blurry with her tears. The sun
struck down upon her back, baking, aching, mocking her with the thick
yellow light in which the flies danced and the pollen hung. She
wanted to creep into the shade.
But she must go home and save her face. It was dinner-time, and she
must join her family with her old bravery, or they would suspect her
humiliation. She rose to her feet, smoothed her dress, dusted off the
bennet flowers and goose-foot burrs and the rub of pollen from the
foxgloves, pushed back the straggling hair under her hat, wiped her
eyes again, and hoped the stains and blotches of her weeping would
fade before she came to Worge. Then she set out for the opening of
the wood. A man’s shadow lay across it, though she could not see
him as he stood behind an ash-stump. Her breathing became shallow,
and her heart thudded.... He had come back, to find her in her
weakness—he was waiting for her.... No, it was not he, this smaller
man, crouched like a fox against the stump.
“Jerry,” she cried, as she turned the elbow of the path, and met him
face to face.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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