The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A NovelYellott, George
General
The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A Novel
Yellott, George
Fiction
Circumstantial evidence seemed to corroborate the extraordinary
statement of Mrs. Tongue, recorded in the preceding chapter. It was now
recollected that no other horse and rider had been observed to come from
the direction of the Widow Wild's mansion during the day on which it was
known that the lawyer had gone thither to see that eccentric lady in
reference to Clement's claim. For about a week subsequent M. T. Pate was
said to be confined to his house by sickness; and when his friends
called to inquire after his health, they were told by his housekeeper
that he declined to receive any visitors. When he again appeared in
public it was noticed that he traveled as a pedestrian; and several
youths, curious to know what had become of old Whitey, having
clandestinely visited the stable which he had always occupied, upon
peeping through a crevice in the door were astonished at beholding in a
stall a horse which was as hairless as a Chinese dog of the edible
species. They promulgated the opinion that old Whitey had been subjected
to a tonsorial operation, and that his hair had been closely shaven off
by a razor or some other sharp instrument. Another link in the chain of
circumstances was the fact that M. T. Pate now wore a wig; and calling
at the house of Mrs. Hobbs on a certain afternoon, a little daughter of
that lady ran into the room and was taken by the lawyer on his lap. The
innocent child playfully caught hold of Pate's locks, and screamed with
horror at beholding the top of his head coming off. The child was
carried out, vociferously shrieking, and from that day would never
venture in the room when the lawyer visited the house. Although Pate
quickly replaced his wig, the observant Mrs. Hobbs had discovered the
entire nudity of his noddle; and, with all convenient speed, repairing
to the house of Mrs. Foot, gave a detailed account of the catastrophe
which had so frightened her little daughter; emphatically asserting
that all the hair which once grew on the sides of Mr. Pate's head had
mysteriously disappeared, and that his head, deprived of the wig, was as
smooth and depilous as a pumpkin.
Notwithstanding the strange rumors in relation to his ride on the Woolly
Horse, the manners of Mr. Pate in the presence of the gentler sex were
so bland and fascinating that he soon recovered his popularity in the
social circle. The wig, which he now wore, had greatly improved his
personal appearance, and transformed him into quite a handsome man. In a
few weeks the excitement produced by the startling apparition of the
bare-headed rider on the Woolly Horse had subsided, and other subjects
occupied the public mind. Old Whitey was still invisible, but Pate moved
about on foot, and was frequently seen escorting the young ladies of the
town, on their promenades, and to social parties and places of
amusement.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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