The Funny Side of Physic: Or, The Mysteries of Medicine, Presenting the Humorous and Serious Sides of Medical Practice. An Exposé of Medical Humbugs, Quacks, and Charlatans in All Ages and All Countries.Crabtre, Addison Darre
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The Funny Side of Physic: Or, The Mysteries of Medicine, Presenting the Humorous and Serious Sides of Medical Practice. An Exposé of Medical Humbugs, Quacks, and Charlatans in All Ages and All Countries.
Crabtre, Addison Darre
Medicine -- Anecdotes; Quacks and quackery
Another doctress, Mrs. Ormsby, of Orange, N. J., accumulates some fifteen
thousand a year, and is in turn outstripped by another woman practising in
New York, who gets nearly twenty thousand dollars a year. Such certainly
possess great business tact, with or without professional merit, and for
such let all men give them credit.
Several female doctors in Boston receive from three to five thousand
dollars each, yearly.
It is too often the case that a physician's success is reckoned, like a
tradesman's, by what he has gained in a pecuniary point of view. There
are, however, thousands of worthy men, successful with their cases, who,
from less acquisitiveness than benevolence, have failed in securing more
than a bare competence, through a life devoted to their profession.
[Illustration: A SHARP MULE TRADE.]
I presume nearly every physician who has experienced a dozen years in
practice has some mementos of his poor patients' gratitude, in the form,
if not of an ebony bird, or a black cat-skin, of something possessing more
beauty, and, to the benevolent heart, which always beats within the
breast of every true physician, keepsakes prized above gold and silver.
"Who has not kept some trifling thing,
More prized, more prized, than jewels rare,
A faded flower, a broken ring,
A tress of golden hair, a tress of golden hair?"
A very benevolent physician, and a sexagenarian, of New York city, wrote,
twenty years ago, "I even yet enjoy a sort of melancholy satisfaction in
hastening to relieve the suffering poor of my neighborhood, though I know
that my reward will be very small, or, what is far more frequent, that I
shall be paid with ingratitude, if not slander.
"Sometimes there are bright spots in my horizon, and I think myself more
than repaid by a new shirt, or a couple of handkerchiefs--the gift of some
poor, though grateful sewing girl. A few of these little treasures I prize
with peculiar tenderness."
"A tress of hair and a faded leaf
Are paltry things to a cynic's eyes:
But to me they are keys that open the gates
Of a paradise of memories."
ASKING FOR A FEE.
A Boston M. D., who had been in practice fourteen years without
accumulating any property, was about to abandon the profession, and, with
this view, he applied to Fowler, the phrenologist, with the question,
"What pursuit am I best adapted to follow?" Mr. Fowler, with whom he was
unacquainted, said, "The practice of medicine;" but, at the same time, he
assured the doctor that he ought to do business on a _cash_
principle,--"_accipe dum dolet_,"--or employ a collector, as he would
never collect his fees. Acting on this hint, the doctor returned to his
practice, and in a few years was out of debt, and owned a fine residence.
In the matter of collecting fees only he was deficient.
A New York student--if report is true--began earlier to be impressed with
the propriety of getting his fee in advance, as the following will show.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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