When I was an apprentice, my master (Sir Charles Blicke) used to say, "O, sir, you are faint: pray drink this water." "And what do you think was the effect of putting cold water into a man's stomach, under these circumstances?" asks the great Dr. Abernethy. "Why, of course, that it was often rejected in his face." Never put cold water, or cold victuals, into a weak stomach. The above surgeon is responsible for the following advice. An Irishman called in great haste upon the doctor, saying,-- "O, dochter--be jabers, me b'y Tim has swallowed a mouse." "Then, Paddy, be jabers, let your boy Tim swallow a cat." THE OLD LADY AND THE PUMP. One can readily conceive the utility of a warm bath--even a cold water bath, if the bather is robust--or a steam bath, a vapor, or a sun bath; but the advantage of the absurdity which the nineteenth century has introduced from antiquity, viz., the dry cupping, or pumping treatment, is not so self-evident. An old lady, suffering from "rheumatism, and a humor of the blood," was persuaded to visit a "pump-doctor's" rooms. "What's that hollow thing for?" she nervously inquired. "That is a limb-receiver," replied the polite operator. "If the disease is in the limb, we enclose it within this; the rubber excludes the air, and to this faucet we affix the pump, and remove the air from the limb." "Yes, yes; but I thought air was necessary to health; besides, I don't see how that is going to cure the limb. Does it add anything to, or take anything from the limb?" she inquired. "Well--no--yes; that is, it draws the disease out from that part." "Yes, yes; but suppose the disease is all over the person, as mine is." "Then we place them in this," putting his hand upon an article which she had not before discovered. "That? Why, that looks like the case to a Dutchman's pipe, only a sight times larger. And do tell if you shet folks up in that box," cautiously approaching and examining it. The operator assured her such was the case. "Is the disease left in the box when you are done pumping? Does it really suck all the disease into the thing by the process?" she inquired. "Well, madam, you put your questions in a remarkable manner. But it displaces the air around the person, and the vital principle within forces out the disease. It is certain to benefit all diseases," he replied. "Well, I don't see how it can, if it can't be seen. Does it act as physic, emetic, a bath, or do the sores follow right out of the blood into the box?" "Neither, madam." The operator was very patient. "Just try the limb-receiver first; then you can tell better about the whole treatment."