The Funny Side of Physic: Or, The Mysteries of Medicine, Presenting the Humorous and Serious Sides of Medical Practice. An Exposé of Medical Humbugs, Quacks, and Charlatans in All Ages and All Countries.Crabtre, Addison Darre
History
The Funny Side of Physic: Or, The Mysteries of Medicine, Presenting the Humorous and Serious Sides of Medical Practice. An Exposé of Medical Humbugs, Quacks, and Charlatans in All Ages and All Countries.
Crabtre, Addison Darre
Medicine -- Anecdotes; Quacks and quackery
"But the merest lad detects the lost woman. She carries the evidences of
her guilt (or misfortune?) in the very clothes she wears, whether she is
the richly dressed courtesan of the Bowery, or the beggarly street-walker
of the village. There is a delicacy in, and a fine bloom on the nature of
woman, which impurity smites with its first breath, and she cannot conceal
the loss nor cover the shame!"
"If there be but one spot upon thy name,
One eye thou fearest to meet, one human voice
Whose tones thou shrinkest from, Woman! veil thy face,
And bow thy head and die!"
Then is there no help for woman's condition in this cold, uncharitable
world? you ask, in view of these facts related above. Yes; _but it rests
with woman_. It must begin with the first breath the female infant draws.
Educate her from the cradle. Give her the freedom of the boy, the pure air
that the boy breathes; not the romping, rude, boisterous plays, perhaps
(?), of the boy, but plenty of outdoor exercise, runs, slides, skates,
rides; let her laugh, yea _shout_, if it be in a country place, till the
woods ring again with the merry echoes, and the puzzled forest nymphs
issue from their invaded retreats, endeavoring to solve the riddle by
ocular demonstration which their ears have failed to unravel, viz., the
sex, as revealed in the strength of voice and buoyancy of spirits, or
expressed in unrestrained laughter!
"O, shocking! How hoidenish!"
Who says to laugh is "_hoidenish_?" A female invariably! And this is just
what we are explaining: women must change tactics as teachers. There is
time enough to instruct the _young_ lady, after the girl or the miss has
developed muscle, vitalized her blood, and capacitated her brain for the
sterner realities of life.
Let women learn to be true teachers of women.
Begin at the beginning. This is the only way. Stand by one another in the
reform. Never mind the ballot; don't try to wear the _breeches_. No--the
male attire I mean.
The superfluous boarding-school education must give place to something
more substantial. Mrs. Dashaway is to the point:--
"No, Pauline; home eddycation is perferable. If there is a requestred spot
on this toad-stool I detest more'n another it is a female cemetery, where
bread-and-butter girls are sent and quartered for a finished eddycation;
and it does finish most of em."
"O, no, no, aunty. You mean _sequestered_ spot, and sent _quarterly_ to a
_seminary_."
"Well, well; you've got too many oceans in your head already of Greek and
zebra, of itchiology, and other humerous works; as for me, give me pure
blood, sound teeth, and a good constitution, and let them what's got them
sort of diseases see the good Samaritan, and ten to eleven if he don't
cure them in less than no time. Land! if Pauline ain't drummin' the
piany!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account