The following words were hastily scrawled in pencil on a scrap of paper: "Farewell! We shall not see each other any more. It is not from pride that I go. No; I cannot do anything else. Yesterday, when I was crying before you, it only needed a word from you--only one single word. I should have staid. You did not speak it. It must be better so. Farewell, for always." * * * * * One word! Fool that I had been! This word! I had said it with tears over and over. I had scattered it to the wind. I had repeated it--how often--to the lonely fields; but to her I had not said it. I had not told her that I loved her. And now I must never say it. When I met her in that fatal room, I myself had no clear consciousness of my love. Perhaps I was not even yet awakened to it while I was sitting with her brother in helpless and fearful silence. A moment later it broke out with irresistible force as I shuddered at the possibility of harm to her, and began to seek her, to call her, but then it was already too late. "But that is impossible," you say. I do not know whether it is possible, but I know that it is true. Assja would not have left me if there had been a trace of coquetry in her, and if her position had not been a false one. She could not bear that which every other girl could have borne; but that I had not realized. My evil genius held my confession back from my lips, as I saw Gagin for the last time, at the dark window, and the last thread that I might have seized slipped from my fingers. On the same day I returned to L---- with my travelling trunk, and took passage for Cologne. I remember that, as the boat was under way, and I was taking leave in spirit of the streets and the places I should never lose from memory, I saw Nancy on the bank. She was sitting on a bench. Her face was pale, but not sorrowful, and a stalwart young peasant stood beside her, laughing and talking to her. On the other shore of the river the little Madonna looked out, sad as ever, from the green shadow of the old oak tree. * * * * * I found myself on the Gagins' track in Cologne. I learned that they had started for London. Hastily I followed them; but in London all my inquiries were fruitless. For a long time I would not be discouraged, for a long time I kept up an obstinate search; but at last I was obliged to give up hope of finding them. And I never saw them again; I never saw Assja again. Of her brother I heard brief news sometimes; but she had for ever vanished from my sight. I do not know if she is yet living. Once, while travelling, years afterward, I caught a hasty glimpse of a woman in a railway carriage whose face reminded me vividly of features never to be forgotten, but I was deceived by a chance resemblance. Assja remained in my memory as I had known her in the fairest days of my life, and as I had last seen her, bowed over the arm of the low wooden chair.