Africa, North -- Fiction; British -- Africa, North -- Fiction; Love stories; Married women -- Fiction
“Is he afraid of women as he is afraid of prayer?” she thought, and
suddenly the sense of humiliation and anger left her, and was succeeded
by a powerful curiosity such as she had never felt before about anyone.
She realised that this curiosity had dawned in her almost at the first
moment when she saw the stranger, and had been growing ever since. One
circumstance after another had increased it till now it was definite,
concrete. She wondered that she did not feel ashamed of such a feeling
so unusual in her, and surely unworthy, like a prying thing. Of all her
old indifference that side which confronted people had always been the
most sturdy, the most solidly built. Without affectation she had been a
profoundly incurious woman as to the lives and the concerns of others,
even of those whom she knew best and was supposed to care for most.
Her nature had been essentially languid in human intercourse. The
excitements, troubles, even the passions of others had generally stirred
her no more than a distant puppet-show stirs an absent-minded passer in
the street.
In Africa it seemed that her whole nature had been either violently
renewed, or even changed. She could not tell which. But this strong
stirring of curiosity would, she believed, have been impossible in the
woman she had been but a week ago, the woman who travelled to Marseilles
dulled, ignorant of herself, longing for change. Perhaps instead of
being angry she ought to welcome it as a symptom of the re-creation she
longed for.
While she changed her gown for dinner that night she debated within
herself how she would treat her fellow-guest when she met him in the
_salle-a-manger_. She ought to cut him after what had occurred, she
supposed. Then it seemed to her that to do so would be undignified, and
would give him the impression that he had the power to offend her. She
resolved to bow to him if they met face to face. Just before she went
downstairs she realised how vehement her internal debate had been, and
was astonished. Suzanne was putting away something in a drawer, bending
down and stretching out her plump arms.
“Suzanne!” Domini said.
“Yes, Mam’zelle!”
“How long have you been with me?”
“Three years, Mam’zelle.”
The maid shut the drawer and turned round, fixing her shallow,
blue-grey eyes on her mistress, and standing as if she were ready to be
photographed.
“Would you say that I am the same sort of person to-day as I was three
years ago?”
Suzanne looked like a cat that has been startled by a sudden noise.
“The same, Mam’zelle?”
“Yes. Do you think I have altered in that time?”
Suzanne considered the question with her head slightly on one side.
“Only here, Mam’zelle,” she replied at length.
“Here!” said Domini, rather eagerly. “Why, I have only been here
twenty-six hours.”
“That is true. But Mam’zelle looks as if she had a little life here, a
little emotion. Mon Dieu! Mam’zelle will pardon me, but what is a woman
who feels no emotion? A packet. Is it not so, Mam’zelle?”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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