I had never looked for the need in any woman’s face. I had been absorbed
in contemplation of my own chastity--had hurried through life with
hands in pockets, fearful lest I might be robbed. Vi’s need, which I had
recognized, I had made ten times more poignant. I had waited for her.
What good had I done by it? I might go on waiting. Meanwhile there were
Fiesole and Life knocking at my door. My constancy to Vi had become a
luxury.
A girl slipped her arm in mine. “’Allo! You zink I am pretty?”
She was a _cocotte_, little more than a child, so delicate and slight.
Her hair was flaxen and blowy; her complexion a transparent china-white;
her dress décolleté and cut in a deep V between the breasts. She pushed
her small face up to mine with the red lips parted, clinging to me with
the innocent familiarity of one who had asked no more than a roguish
question.
“You’re pretty, but----”
“Zen we go togezer!”
“I’m afraid not.”
“Pourquoi non?”
“I’m hoping to meet someone.”
She released me at once with a good-natured smile. “La! La! I hopes you
find ’er.”
She tripped away, turning before she was lost in the crowd to wave her
hand. I told myself that her flower was the jonquil.
It was one o’clock when, after wandering about, I found myself back
at the same place. I could not sleep; my brain was too active with
excitement. Instead of being sad because of Fiesole, I was unreasonably
elated. I took a seat at a table on the pavement and ordered coffee
and cognac. Every man and woman within sight was a lover, and I sat
solitary. As the hour grew later men and women grew more frank in their
embraces, and all with that naïve assumption of privacy which makes the
Frenchman, even in his vices, seem so much a child. The sex-instinct
beat about “the mountain”--the air quivered and pulsated.
Girls rustled in the shadows. Lovers, chance-met, danced home together.
Strange to say, I found nothing sinful in it--only romance. I had ceased
to look beyond the immediate sensation.
“Poor boy! You not find ’er?”
I looked up; my lady of the jonquils was leaning over my shoulder.
“No.”
“Eh bien, peut-être, you find her to-morrow, _hein!_ If not, zere are
ozers.” She waved her small gloved hands in a circle, bringing them back
to include herself. She looked a good little soul, standing there so
bravely disguising her weariness.
“Tired?”
“It ees nozing.”
“Won’t you join me?”
Immediately we were in sympathy. She owned me with a playfulness which
had no hint of indelicacy. Drawing off her gloves, she rested her chin
on her knitted fingers and regarded me laughingly with her world-wise
eyes. She was scarcely more than half my years, I suppose.
“Zere are ozers,” she repeated.
“Not for me,” I said; “not to-night.”
“Dieu! You are funny, my friend. You lofe like zat?” The waiter hovered
nearer, flirting his napkin across the marble-tables.
I beckoned; he dashed up like a hen to which I had scattered grain.
“Croûte au pot?”
“Bien, Monsieur.”
“Filet aux truffes.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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