The Gem CollectorWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
The Gem Collector
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories; Jewel thieves -- Fiction
The American liner, _St. Louis_, lay in the Empress Dock, at
Southampton, taking aboard her passengers. All sorts and conditions of
men flowed in an unceasing stream up the gangway.
Leaning over the second-class railing, Jimmy Pitt and Spike Mullins
watched them thoughtfully.
Jimmy looked up at the Blue Peter that fluttered from the foremast,
and then at Spike. The Bowery boy's face was stolid and
expressionless. He was smoking a short wooden pipe, with an air of
detachment.
"Well, Spike," said Jimmy. "Your schooner's on the tide now, isn't it?
Your vessel's at the quay. You've got some queer-looking fellow
travellers. Don't miss the two Cinghalese sports, and the man in the
turban and the baggy breeches. I wonder if they're air-tight. Useful
if he fell overboard."
"Sure," said Spike, directing a contemplative eye toward the garment
in question. "He knows his business."
"I wonder what those men on the deck are writing. They've been
scribbling away ever since we came here. Probably society journalists.
We shall see in next week's _Sphere_: 'Among the second-class
passengers we noticed Mr. "Spike" Mullins, looking as cheery as ever.'
It's a pity you're so set on going, Spike. Why not change your mind,
and stop?"
For a moment, Spike looked wistful. Then his countenance resumed its
woodenness. "Dere ain't no use for me dis side, Mr. Chames," he said.
"New York's de spot. Youse don't want none of me, now you're married.
How's Miss Molly, Mr. Chames?"
"Splendid, Spike; thanks. We're going over to France by to-night's
boat."
"It's been a queer business," said Jimmy, after a pause. "A deuced rum
business. Well, I've come very well out of it, at any rate. It seems
to me that you're the only one of us who doesn't end happily, Spike.
I'm married. McEachern's butted into society so deep that it would
take an excavating party with dynamite to get him out of it. Molly.
Well, Molly's made a bad bargain, but I hope she won't regret it.
We're all going some, except you. You're going out on the old trail
again--which begins in Third Avenue and ends in Sing Sing. Why tear
yourself away, Spike?"
Spike concentrated his gaze on a weedy young emigrant in a blue
jersey, who was having his eye examined by the overworked doctor, and
seemed to be resenting it.
"Dere's nuttin' doin' dis side, Mr. Chames," he said, at length. "I
want to get busy."
"Ulysses Mullins!" said Jimmy, looking at him curiously. "I know the
feeling. There's only one cure, and I don't suppose you'll ever take
it. You don't think a lot of women, do you? You're the rugged
bachelor."
"Goils----" began Spike comprehensively, and abandoned the topic without
dilating on it further.
Jimmy lit his pipe, and threw the match overboard. The sun came out
from behind a cloud, and the water sparkled.
"Dose were great jools, Mr. Chames," said Spike thoughtfully.
"I believe you're still brooding over them, Spike."
"We could have got away wit' dem, if you'd have stood for it. Dead
easy."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account