The German Classics of the Nineteenth and Twentieth Centuries, Volume 04: Masterpieces of German Literature Translated into English. in Twenty Volumes
General
The German Classics of the Nineteenth and Twentieth Centuries, Volume 04: Masterpieces of German Literature Translated into English. in Twenty Volumes
German literature -- 19th century -- Translations into English; German literature -- 20th century -- Translations into English
GOTTLIEB (_gives him his hand_).
Good friend!
HINZE.
Human beings labor under the delusion that the only remarkable thing
about us is that instinctive purring which arises from a certain
feeling of comfort; for that reason they often stroke us awkwardly and
then we usually purr to secure ourselves against blows. But if they
knew how to manage us in the right way, believe me, they would
accustom our good nature to everything, and Michel, your neighbor's
tom-cat, would even at times be pleased to jump through a hoop for the
king.
GOTTLIEB.
You're right in that.
HINZE.
I love you, Master Gottlieb, very much. You have never stroked me the
wrong way, you have let me sleep when I felt like it, you have
objected whenever your brothers wanted to take me up, to go with me
into the dark, and see the so-called electrical sparks--for all this I
now want to show my gratitude.
GOTTLIEB.
Noble-hearted Hinze! Ah, how unjustly do they speak ill of you and
scornfully, doubting your loyalty and devotion! My eyes are being
opened--how my knowledge of human nature is increasing and so
unexpectedly!
FISCHER.
Friends, where has our hope for a picture of family life gone to?
LEUTNER.
Why it is almost too nonsensical.
SCHLOSS.
I feel as though I were in a dream.
HINZE.
You are a good man, Master Gottlieb; but, do not take it ill of me,
you are somewhat narrow, confined--to speak out freely, not one of the
best heads.
GOTTLIEB.
Alas, no!
HINZE.
You don't know now, for example, what you want to do.
GOTTLIEB.
You read my thoughts perfectly.
HINZE.
If you had a muff made out of my fur--
GOTTLIEB.
Do not take it amiss, comrade, that this idea just passed through my
mind.
HINZE.
Why, no, it was an altogether human thought. Can you think of no way
of managing?
GOTTLIEB.
Not a thing!
HINZE.
You might carry me around and show me for money; but that is never a
sure means of support.
GOTTLIEB.
No.
HINZE.
You might publish a journal or a German paper, with the motto, _Homo
sum_--or a novel; I should be willing to collaborate with you--but
that is too much bother.
GOTTLIEB.
Yes.
HINZE.
Well, I'll see that I take even better care of you. Depend upon it,
you are yet to become very happy through me.
GOTTLIEB.
O, best, most noble man. (_He embraces him tenderly_.)
HINZE.
But you must also trust me.
GOTTLIEB.
Entirely. Why, now I realize your honorable spirit.
HINZE.
Well, then, do me a favor and bring the shoemaker immediately to take
my measure for a pair of boots.
GOTTLIEB.
The shoemaker? Boots?
HINZE.
You are surprised, but in accomplishing what I intend to do for you, I
have to walk and run so much that I have to wear boots.
GOTTLIEB.
But why not shoes?
HINZE.
Master Gottlieb, you do not understand the matter; they must lend me
some dignity, an imposing air, in short, a certain manliness to which
one never attains in shoes.
GOTTLIEB.
Well, as you think best; but the shoemaker will be surprised.
HINZE.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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