Australia -- Fiction; Autobiographical fiction; Bildungsromans; Melbourne (Vic.) -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
Deep within her, none the less, there lurked a feeling which sometimes
made as if to raise its head: a feeling that she did not really like M.
P., or admire her, or respect her; one which, had it come quite to
life, would have kicked against Mary's authority, been contemptuous of
her unimaginative way of seeing and saying things, on the alert to
remind its owner that HER way, too, had a right to existence. But is
was not strong enough to make itself heard, or rather Laura refused to
hear it, and turned a deaf ear whenever it tried to hint at its
presence.--For Mr. Worldly-Wiseman was her model just now.
Whereas Cupid--there was something in Cupid that was congenial to her.
A plain girl, with irregular features--how she had come by her nickname
no one knew--Cupid was three years older than Laura, and one of the few
in the school who loved reading for its own sake. In a manner, she was
cleverer even than M. P.; but it was not a school-booky way, and hence
was not thought much of. However, Laura felt drawn to her at once--even
though Cupid treated her as quite a little girl--and they sometimes got
as far as talking of books they had read. From this whiff of her, Laura
was sure that Cupid would have had more understanding than M. P. for
her want of veracity; for Cupid had a kind of a dare-devil mind in a
hidebound character, and was often very bold of speech.
Yet it was not Cupid's good opinion she worked for, with might and main.
The rate of her upward progress in Mary's estimation could be gauged by
the fact that the day came when the elder girl spoke openly to her of
her crime. At the first merciless words Laura winced hotly, both at and
for the tactlessness of which Mary was guilty. But, the first shameful
stab over, she felt the better of it; yes, it was a relief to speak to
some one of what she had borne alone for so long. To speak of it, and
even to argue round it a little; for, like most wrongdoers, Laura soon
acquired a taste for dwelling on her misdeed. And Mary, being entirely
without humour, and also unversed in dealing with criminals, did not
divine that this was just a form of self-indulgence. It was Cupid who
said: "Look here, Infant, you'll be getting cocky about what you did,
if you don't look out."
Mary would not allow that a single one of Laura's excuses held water.
"That's the sheerest nonsense. You don't seem to realise that you tried
to defame another person's moral character," she said, in the assured,
superior way that so impressed Laura.--And this aspect of the case,
which had never once occurred to her, left Laura open-mouthed; and yet
a little doubtful: Mr. Shepherd was surely too far above her, and too
safely ensconced in holiness, to be injured by anything she might say.
But the idea gave her food for thought; and she even tentatively
developed her story along these unfamiliar lines, just to see how it
might have turned out.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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