Humorous stories; Love stories; Villages -- Fiction
"Bless my soul, Miss Miriam," he said; "nobody in this world ever
brought me nuthin' to eat, 'cause they know'd I didn't need it, an'
gittin' the best of livin' right here in your house, Miss Miriam, an' if
they had brought it I wouldn't have took it an' swallowed the family
pride; an' what's more, the doctor's cook didn't bring that pie on
purpose for me. She just comed down here to ax me how to make real good
corn-cakes, knowin' that I was a fust-rate cook, an' could make
corn-cakes, an' she wanted to know how to do it. When I tole her jes'
how to do it,--ash-cakes, griddle-cakes, batter-cake, every kin' of
cake,--she was so mighty obligated that she took a little bit of a pie,
made of meat, out of the bag what she'd brought along to eat on the way
home, not feelin' hungry at lunch time, an' give it to me. An' not
wantin' to hurt her feelin's, I jes' took it, an' when I went to my
house I het it an' eat it, an' bless your soul, Miss Miriam, it did
taste good; for that there woman in the kitchen don't give me half
enough to eat, an' never no corn-bread an' ham fat, which is mighty
cheap, Miss Miriam, an' a long sight better for a workin' pusson than
crusts of wheat bread a week old an'--"
"You don't mean to say," interrupted Miriam, "that Molly does not give
you enough to eat? I'll speak to her about that. She ought to be ashamed
of herself."
"Now look here, Miss Miriam," said Mike, speaking more earnestly, "don't
you go an' do that. If you tell her that, she'll go an' make me the
biggest corn-pone anybody ever seed, an' she'll put pizen into it. Oh,
it'd never do to say anythin' like that to Molly Tooney, if she's got me
to feed. Jes' let me tell you, Miss Miriam, don't you say nothin' to
Molly Tooney 'bout me. I never could sleep at night if I thought she was
stirrin' up pizen in my vittles. But I tell you, Miss Miriam, if you was
to say Molly, that you an' Mr. Haverley liked corn-cakes an' was always
used to 'em before you come here, an' that they 'greed with you, then in
course she'd make 'em, an' there'd be a lot left over for me, for I don't
'spect you all could eat the corn-bread she'd make, but I'd eat it, bein'
so powerful hungry for corn-meal."
"Mike," said Miriam, "you shall have corn-bread, but that is all
nonsense about Molly. I do not see how you could get such a notion into
your head."
Mike gave himself a shrug.
"Now look a here, Miss Miriam," he said; "I've heard before of red-headed
cooks, an' colored pussons as wasn't satisfied with their victuals, an'
nobody knows what they died of, an' the funerals was mighty slim, an' no
'count, the friends an' congregation thinkin' there might be somethin'
'tagious. Them red-headed kind of cooks is mighty dangerous, Miss Miriam,
an' lemme tell you, the sooner you git rid of them, the better."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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