Nadia withdrew her hand somewhat precipitately as he spoke, and went
to the window. Miss Forester, watching her curiously, saw the red
color mount to her very brow, and pitied her. Miss Forester thought
Felix a most attractive young man, and marveled that Stepan
Stepanovitch should allow him to be so freely in his daughter's
company. It had seemed almost impossible that these two young
creatures, thrown so exclusively into each other's society, should
not fall in love with each other. Yet all along the Englishwoman had
been doubtful whether Felix returned the feeling which she was
positive he had aroused in Nadia. And this morning, when she had
received the whispered confidences of Kathinka, the woman who had
been summoned to wash and bind up Felix's wound, there had been a
small thing said:
"And though he is a heretic, he wears around his neck a charm or a
token. It is the half of a small silver coin."
Miss Forester's heart contracted with a sharp pang. She did not like
the notion that her darling Nadia should be made unhappy.
Vronsky saw the withdrawal of Nadia, and rose to his feet. He
followed her. "Alas!" he said, "men are selfish things! I am
bewailing my loss, and cutting you to your sympathetic heart. I am
lamenting, and I do not reflect that my Felix, who is to me wife and
son and all I have to love in a desolate world, is nothing to
others--nothing!" He covered his face. "Mademoiselle, I cannot
control my feeling. Let me go out into the garden until I have got
the better of this weakness." His tears were actually falling, and
he shook with emotion. To the astonishment of her governess Nadia
went up to him, and laid her hands upon his shoulders; it seemed as
if she almost embraced him, as though he had been a father.
"Oh!" she cried, and her sweet voice--the Slav voice, with tears in
it--quivered and vibrated with emotion. "Oh! is it possible that he
should love a girl who--who cannot keep faith with him?"
Vronsky grew suddenly very still. His sobs ceased. As though he
were touching some sacred thing, he put his arms about the girl's
shoulders. A curious succession of feelings played over his fine,
expressive face. It was as if he knew that she felt towards him as
towards an elderly relative--him, who was quivering with the true
passion of a man for her--and as if, in the moment of his hopeless
craving and bitter sadness, some other idea, new and sweet, had
dawned upon his unselfish soul.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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