Americans -- Europe -- Fiction; Europe -- Fiction; Love stories; Marriage -- Fiction; Married people -- Fiction; Socialites -- Fiction
The only thing he was sure of was that he was not going to remain in
the Hickses’ employ: when they left Rome for Central Asia he had no
intention of accompanying them. The part of Mr. Buttles’ successor was
becoming daily more intolerable to him, for the very reasons that had
probably made it most gratifying to Mr. Buttles. To be treated by Mr.
and Mrs. Hicks as a paid oracle, a paraded and petted piece of property,
was a good deal more distasteful than he could have imagined any
relation with these kindly people could be. And since their aspirations
had become frankly social he found his task, if easier, yet far less
congenial than during his first months with them. He preferred patiently
explaining to Mrs. Hicks, for the hundredth time, that Sassanian and
Saracenic were not interchangeable terms, to unravelling for her the
genealogies of her titled guests, and reminding her, when she “seated”
her dinner-parties, that Dukes ranked higher than Princes. No--the job
was decidedly intolerable; and he would have to look out for another
means of earning his living. But that was not what he had really got
away to think about. He knew he should never starve; he had even begun
to believe again in his book. What he wanted to think of was Susy--or
rather, it was Susy that he could not help thinking of, on whatever
train of thought he set out.
Again and again he fancied he had established a truce with the past: had
come to terms--the terms of defeat and failure with that bright enemy
called happiness. And, in truth, he had reached the point of definitely
knowing that he could never return to the kind of life that he and Susy
had embarked on. It had been the tragedy, of their relation that loving
her roused in him ideals she could never satisfy. He had fallen in
love with her because she was, like himself, amused, unprejudiced and
disenchanted; and he could not go on loving her unless she ceased to
be all these things. From that circle there was no issue, and in it he
desperately revolved.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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