At first, and this was not usual, he spoke about himself in a strain
of sincere humility, taking blame upon himself for his inability to do
effectively the great service his Master had set him to do. He meant
to have given himself more entirely to the dear people among whom he
labored; he hoped to show himself more worthy of the trust they had
given him; he was grateful for the success of his mission, but no one
knew so well as he how far short it came of being what he ought to have
made it. He knew indeed how weak he was, and he asked the aid of their
sympathy and encouragement. It seemed to be with difficulty that he said
this, and to Ruth's sympathetic ear there was an evidence of physical
exhaustion in his tone. There was in it, also, for her, a confession of
failure, the cry of the preacher, in sorrow and entreaty, that says, “I
have called so long, and ye would not listen.”
As he went on, still with an effort and feebly, there came over the
little group a feeling of awe and wonderment, and the silence was
profound. Still steadying himself by the reading-desk, he went on to
speak of other things, of those of his followers who listened, of the
great mass swirling about them in the streets who did not listen and did
not care; of the little life that now is so full of pain and hardship
and disappointment, of good intentions frustrated, of hopes that
deceive, and of fair prospects that turn to ashes, of good lives that
go wrong, of sweet natures turned to bitterness in the unaided struggle.
His voice grew stronger and clearer, as his body responded to the
kindling theme in his soul. He stepped away from the desk nearer the
rail, the bowed head was raised. “What does it matter?” he said. “It is
only for a little while, my children.” Those who heard him that day say
that his face shone like that of an angel, and that his voice was like a
victorious clarion, so clear, so sweet, so inspiring, as he spoke of the
life that is to come, and the fair certainty of that City where he with
them all wished to be.
As he closed, some were kneeling, many were crying; all, profoundly
moved, watched him as, with the benediction and the sign of the cross,
he turned and walked swiftly to the door of the sacristy. It opened, and
then Ruth Leigh heard a cry, “Father Damon! Father Damon!” and there was
a rush into the chancel. Hastening through the throng, which promptly
made way for the doctor, she found Father Damon lying across the
threshold, as he had fallen, colorless and unconscious. She at once took
command of the situation. The body was lifted to the plain couch in the
room, a hasty examination was made of pulse and heart, a vial of brandy
was produced from her satchel, and messengers were despatched for things
needed, and especially for beef-tea.
“Is he dead, Dr. Leigh? Is he any better, doctor? What is the matter,
doctor?”
“Want of nourishment,” replied Dr. Leigh, savagely.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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