From that morning began a strange acquaintance that certainly could not
be called a friendship. There could be no question at all that Mary was
terrified of Sarah; there could also be no question that Mary was
Sarah's obedient slave. The cynical Hortense, prepared as she was for
anything strange and unexpected in Sarah's actions, was, nevertheless,
puzzled now.
One afternoon, wet and dismal, the two of them sitting in a little box
of a room in the little box of a house, Sarah huddled in a chair, her
eyes staring in front of her, Hortense sewing, her white, bony fingers
moving sharply like knives, the maid asked a question:
"What do you see--Sar-ah--in that infant?"
"What infant?" asked Sarah, without moving her eyes.
"That Mary with whom now you always are."
"We play games together," said Sarah.
"You do not. You may be playing a game--she does nothing. She is
terrified--out of her life."
"She is very silly. It's funny how silly she is. I like her to be
frightened."
Mary's nurse told Mary's mother that, in her opinion, Sarah was not a
nice child. But Sarah had been invited to tea at the confused, simple
abode of the Kitson family, and had behaved perfectly.
"I think you must be wrong, nurse," said Mrs. Kitson. "She seems a very
nice little girl. Mary needs companions. It's good for her to be taken
out of herself."
Had Mrs. Kitson been of a less confused mind, however, had she had more
time for the proper observation of her daughter, she would have noticed
her daughter's pale cheeks, her daughter's fits of crying, her
daughter's silences. Even as the bird is fascinated by the snake, so was
Mary Kitson fascinated by Sarah Trefusis.
"You are torturing that infant," said Hortense, and Sarah smiled.
IV
Mary was by no means the first of Sarah's victim's. There had been many
others. Utterly aloof, herself, from all emotions of panic or terror, it
had, from the very earliest age, interested her to see those passions at
work in others. Cruelty for cruelty's sake had no interest for her at
all; to pull the wings from flies, to tie kettles to the tails of
agitated puppies, to throw stones at cats, did not, in the least, amuse
her. She had once put a cat in the fire, but only because she had seen
it play with a terrified mouse. That had affronted her sense of justice.
But she was gravely and quite dispassionately interested in the terror
of Mary Kitson. In later life a bull fight was to appear to her a
tiresome affair, but the domination of one human being over another,
absorbing. She had, too, at the very earliest age, that conviction that
it was pleasant to combat all sentiment, all appeals to be "good," all
soft emotions of pity, anything that could suggest that Right was of
more power than Might.
It was as though she said, "You may think that even now you will get me.
I tell you I'm a rebel from the beginning; you'll never catch me showing
affection or sympathy. If you do you may do your worst."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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