Composers -- Fiction; German fiction -- Translations into English; Germany -- Fiction
He laid his hand on Gertrude’s hair. She interpreted the gesture as a
visible sign that his promise had been fulfilled; that this work
belonged to her; that he had created it for her, had taken it from her
heart, and was returning it to the heart from whence it came.
X
Zierfuss, the music dealer, had sent out invitations to a concert.
Daniel did not feel like going. Gertrude asked Eleanore if she would
not go with her. Daniel called for them after the concert.
Eleanore told him on the way home that she had received a letter for him
that afternoon bearing a London stamp.
“From Benda?” asked Daniel quickly.
“It is Benda’s handwriting,” replied Eleanore. “I was going to bring it
to you when Gertrude called for me. Wait out in the front of the house,
and I’ll go in and get it.”
“Take dinner with us this evening, Eleanore,” said Gertrude, looking
rather uncertainly at Daniel.
“If it is agreeable to Daniel....”
“No nonsense, Eleanore, of course it is agreeable to me,” said Daniel.
A quarter of an hour later Daniel was sitting by the lamp reading
Benda’s letter.
The first thing his friend told him was that he was to join a scientific
expedition to the Congo, and that his party would follow almost exactly
the same route that had been taken by the Stanley Expedition when it set
out to look for Emin Pascha.
Benda wrote: “This letter then, my dear friend, is written to say
good-bye for a number of years, perhaps forever. I feel as if I had been
born anew. I have eyes again; and the ideas that fill my brain are no
longer condemned to be stifled in the morass of imprisoned colleagues,
loyal and inimical. To labour in nature’s laboratory will make me forget
the wrongs I have suffered, the injustice that has been done me. Hunger
and thirst, disease and danger will of course have to be endured; they
are the effects of those crimes of civilisation that spare the body
while they poison the mind and soul.”
Further on Benda wrote: “I am bound to my home by only two people, my
mother and you. When I think of you, a feeling of pride comes over me;
every hour we spent together is indelibly stamped on my heart. But there
is one delicate point: it is a point of conscience. Call it, so far as I
am concerned, a chip; call it anything you please. The fact is I have
had a Don Quixotic run in, and I have got to defend myself.”
Daniel shook his head and read on. Benda knew nothing of his marriage.
He did not even seem to know that Daniel and Gertrude had been engaged.
Or if he had known it he had forgotten it. Daniel could hardly believe
his own eyes when he came to the following passage: “My greatest anxiety
always lay in the fear that you would pass Eleanore by. I was too
cowardly to tell you how I felt on this point, and I have reproached
myself ever since for my cowardice. Now that I am leaving I tell you how
I feel about this matter, though not exactly with the sensation of
performing a belated task.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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