Bohemianism -- Fiction; City and town life -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
“A great disillusionment waits for you,” she said honestly. “I am only a
womanly hypocrite. I am not worthy of the violet crown nor the vanguard.
I’m as simple hearted as Lorraine and far more stupid when you come to
know the real me.... I have always loved you. I flirted only to see if
it would not rouse the man of you to protest. I let Lissa influence me,
harm my voice, color my notions, to see if you would not speak out as
‘my man,’ not my singing teacher, my master critic.... I tried in every
avenue I could, Bliss, to make you care. Finally, you told me your vision
and the greatest joy of it was not the vision but the thought you were
sharing it with me. I told myself, ‘at last I have something to work for,
something with which I can tempt his interest—bait for his affection’—you
see? So I set to work to live according to your ideals, not that I did
not believe it, but because you, your own self, had told me of it and it
was your fondest wish to see it realized.... Miss Clergy’s death brought
me the fortune ... the glorious ending of the war my opportunity ... and
so on. Now you say you love me. And I love you. But I warn you that all
your visions and ideals mattered not so much as the fact of your sharing
them with me, the nearest I had ever come to being essential to some one,
belonging to some one—as I fancied in the old circus days when I played
the bearded lady was my mother and the animals my brothers and sisters.
F-funny, isn’t it? Well, am I altogether too disappointing—clay toes
will peep out but it is better you should see them now—not later.” She
waited his verdict, her head tilted defiantly and the glorious, blue eyes
smiling bravely.
He did not hesitate. “Do you know a man’s greatest joy is to discover
the one he loves best of every one is not all gray angel, that he will
not have to exist on the heights, even though he is prepared to break
masculine precedent and do so, but a real woman with adorable weaknesses
and amusing faults, spasms of ‘intuition’ and bothers about becoming hats
and concern as to the said man’s habit of not wearing overshoes—that
she will not scorn a broad shoulder to weep on if the cook leaves
unceremoniously, nor a bit of domination when it comes to selecting the
right school for the boy or the number of frocks for the girl’s coming
out? Now, I’ve matched clay toes with you, most delightful lover’s game
in the world.... Let me whisper something else, Thurley; I was growing
afraid of you. I thought I had better capture you while you were content
to be merely a gray angel lest you become the shining, white spirit of
the vanguard and such a happening be made impossible.”
Without waiting for her approval, he took her in his arms.
Making the nightly rounds to see if the windows were properly fastened,
Ali Baba paused in the offing. He glanced up at the mistletoe under which
he had happened to halt and smiled with sentimental satisfaction.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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