The Greatest Plague of Life: or, the Adventures of a Lady in Search of a Good Servant.Mayhew, Henry
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The Greatest Plague of Life: or, the Adventures of a Lady in Search of a Good Servant.
Mayhew, Henry
English wit and humor; Household employees
brown paper cocked hat stuck on his head, or even, perhaps, with his
face blacked all over with burnt cork, and covered with large bits of
the red wafers I had for the black-beetles; while if, to give one an air
above the common, I made him carry the prayer-books for me to church, I
should be certain either to hear half-a-dozen of the young monkey’s
marbles roll all down the aisle in the very middle of the sermon, or
else, if I took the precaution of making him empty his pockets before he
went there, as sure as sure could be, he would go fast asleep, and
snore as I well knew _he_ alone could snore, and until I fancied every
eye in the church was fixed upon me.
Positively it was as much as one person could do to keep that shocking
scapegrace of a Wittals from going about in actual rags; and the whole
of my mornings used to be entirely taken up in repairing his dress
livery. Either I should have to try to fine-draw the knees of his
trousers, for the twentieth time--till they looked like the heels of a
pair of old stockings--or there’d be a piece as big as the palm of your
hand torn out at the foot where the strap buttons had been--or one of
the pocket-holes slit nearly down to his knees--or else the jacket would
have one of the cuffs half off--or one of the sleeves almost out--while
as for those beautiful three rows of sugar-loaf buttons, I declare
almost every other one was missing before the week was out, and even
they were sure to be with all the silver rubbed off of them, and as
coppery looking as the plated ornaments on the harness of a hackney
coach horse.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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