"'Then who shall stand if Thou, O Lord, dost mark iniquity?'" Lewis
quoted.
"There are two men only who will not be ashamed to look their work in
the face in the end--the brazen opportunist and the rigid Puritan.
Suppose you had some desperate frontier work to get through with and a
body of men to pick for it, whom would you take? Not the ordinary,
colourless, respectable being, and still less academic nonentities! If
I had my pick, my companions should either be the narrowest religionists
or frank, unashamed blackguards. I should go to the Calvinists and the
fanatics for choice, but if I could not get them then I should have the
rankers. For, don't you see, the first would have the fear of God in
them, and that somehow keeps a man from fearing anything else. They
would do their work because they believed it to be their duty. And the
second would have the love of the sport in them, and they should also be
made to dwell in the fear of me. They would do their work because they
liked it, and liked me, and I told them to do it."
"I agree with you absolutely," said Lewis. "I never thought otherwise."
"Good," said Wratislaw. "Now for my application. You've had the
misfortune to fall between the two stools, Lewie. You're too clever for
a Puritan and too good for a ranker. You're too finicking and
high-strung and fanciful for a prosaic world. You think yourself the
laughing philosopher with an infinite appreciation of everything, and
yet you have not the humour to stand aside and laugh at yourself."
"I am a coward, as I have told you," said the other dourly.
"No, you are not. But you can't bring yourself down to the world of
compromises, which is the world of action. You have lost the practical
touch. You muddled your fight with Stocks because you couldn't get out
of touch with your own little world in practice, however you might
manage it in theory. You can't be single-hearted. Twenty impulses are
always pulling different ways with you, and the result is that you
become an unhappy, self-conscious waverer."
Lewis was staring into the fire, and the older man leaned forward and
put his hand very tenderly on his shoulder.
"I don't want to speak about the thing which gives you most pain, old
chap; but I think you have spoiled your chances in the same way in
another matter--the most important matter a man can have to do with,
though it ill becomes a cynical bachelor like myself to say it."
"I know," said Lewis dismally.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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