The Happy WarriorHutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
General
The Happy Warrior
Hutchinson, A. S. M. (Arthur Stuart-Menteth)
Fiction
"I don't think any thing _about_ it," says Miss Purdie, with a stamp of
her little foot. "That _stu_-pid question of yours! _How_ often have
I told you not to use it?"
Very like a little bird, Miss Purdie, with her sharp little glances,
with her nimble little hops to and fro, and with her perky little
cockings of the head on this side and the other as she encourages an
answer.
"Now the grammar lesson and I hope you've both prepared it. Gender of
nouns. Masculine, Govern-_or_. Feminine?"
"Govern-_ess_," venture the boys, a trifle apprehensively.
"Good boys! Masculine, Sorcer-er. Feminine?"
"Sorcer-_ess_," says the chorus, gathering courage.
"Masculine, Cater-_er_. Feminine?"
"Cater-_ess_," bawls the chorus, thoroughly enjoying itself.
"_Not_ so loud! Masculine, Murder-_er_. Feminine?"
"Murder-_ess_," howls the chorus, recklessly delighted.
"Good boys! Now be careful! Prosecutor? Take time over it.
Masculine, Prosecut-_or_. Feminine?"
"Prosecutr-_ess_!" thunders the chorus, plunging to destruction on the
swing of the thing; and "Oh, you _stu_-pids! you _stu_-pids!" cries
Miss Purdie. "You intol-er-able _stu_-pids!" and the unhappy chorus
hangs its head and cowers beneath the little storm it has let loose.
Delightfully appreciative, though, Miss Purdie, when the "break" of ten
minutes comes and when the boys gorge plum-cake and milk and make her
positively quiver with recitals of the terrible gallops on the pony;
and delightfully concerned, too, when, as happens once or twice, Rollo
is discovered to have a headache and is made to lie on the sofa in a
rug and with a hot-water bottle, while the lessons are continued with
Percival in fierce whispers and hissed "_stu_-pids." Delightfully
inconsequent, moreover, Miss Purdie, who at the end of an especially
exasperating morning, when Hunt is heard with the pony outside the
gate, will suddenly cry: "Well, _go_ away then, you thorough little
_stu_-pids; _go_ away!" and will drive them to the door and then at
once will go into ecstatics over the pony and hurry Percival in for
sugar, and quake with terror while the pony nibbles it from her hand,
and stand and wave at her gate while they go flying down the road, one
in the saddle, the other gasping behind.
Delightfully appreciative, Miss Purdie, and they learn to love her for
all their terrible fear of her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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